hate me now, love me later
by ali-chan15
Summary: Hiei and Kurama are madly in love with each other, but neither of them know that the other loves each other. when Hiei tells Kurama how he feels. Chaos insues. Suicide and romance. maybe some lime scenes. Read and Review please! Finished!
1. Love to you Kurama

Ok. I lied. I'm starting my YYH fic now before i go crazy. The summary is below, but I have to rant for a few sentences. You can just scroll down past this part... it has no real meaning. My fics are being evil and refuse to be finished. This of course will be a yaoi fic. The pairing: Kurama/hiei.

Hopefully there are enough of these that you've gotten used to this pairing. You're lucky, or not. Kind of really depends on your opinion. I don't write lemon yaoi fanfics. I might someday, but not anytime soon. I'm finally starting another series that isn't another Inuyahsa. Well, I'll stop ranting and raving and let you read the fic unless of course you skipped this which means you're already reading... Jane till end!

Summary: Kurama and Hiei are finally going to get together. Hiei wants to confess his love for Kurama, but he doesn't know how to do it without scaring off Kurama. Little does Hiei know that Kurama feels the same way about him. Chance of suicide and romance, not lemon scenes but maybe lime (still trying to decide.)

Disclaimer: I don't any of the characters. Never will I own them.

Name: Hate me now, love me later

chapter1: Love to you, Kurama

'Kurama, i can't stay away form you these days. It's never going to be enough until i can be with you. Like i always wanted to. I want you to be my mate. Kurama, i know that you don't love me, but i want to be with you always. I'll see you soon.' Hiei was camped outside Kurama's window in a tree admiring the way Kurama looked as he slept. Slowly morning came and Kurama awoke. Hiei was sleeping on the floor next to his bed. Kurama smiled gently and made no sound as he got up and got into the shower before spending the day at school.

'How often have i found hiei on the floor of my room next to my bed asleep? He doesn't know that if he showed up before i went to bed, I'd let him sleep in the same bed with me.' at his own thoughts, kurama flushed. 'What the hell am i thinking? Hiei would never do that. Not even for sweet snow. If he did sleep in the same bed as me at anytime, i might just have to jump his bones... now Kurama, stop this.'

"Kurama? You up?" hiei called from outside the bathroom door.

"Yes. I was going to shower before school." Kurama replied.

"Ughhhh." Hiei moaned. ' How come Kurama hardly spends time with me anymore? He seems more distant than usual. Maybe he found out my secret love for him! I'll leave now.'

Kurama giggled softly so Hiei couldn't hear him. "Did you say something Hiei?" Kurama asked in a teasing voice.

"No! Listen Kurama... I'm gonna go."

"Hiei... don't you want to stay for breakfast?"

"No. I really need to go. We hanging out tomorrow?"

"Of course. You really don't want breakfast?"

"Nah, I'll see you tomorrow Kurama. You know where I'll be. 11:00. Be there. I'll be waiting. Just like always."

"Right. See you then." Kurama had been getting dressed while speaking to him. Kurama opened the door and found a note to him form Hiei.

Kurama–

We're good friends now and i can't thank you enough for not giving up on me in the long run. We've had our differences and i know that we might eventually part and go our separate ways so i thought I'd tell you something incredibly important tomorrow. I won't forgive you if you don't show up. See you soon, Kurama.

Love to you Kurama,

Hiei.

"That was thoughtful." Kurama muttered to himself. Then he read the letter again. 'Love to you Kurama'? What did Hiei mean by that? Did he mean that he felt the same way Kurama did?

'I'll find out tomorrow. I'll confront him and ask him what he meant. Maybe he feels the same way I do...'

A/N: Ok. This will be getting interesting. I can tell these things by the first chapter. Please stay tuned and review. I'm going to work on the 2nd chapter and as soon as 2 people review I'll post another chapter. Jane! Please review and let me know what you think!


	2. A confession of Feelings?

A/N: I'm back! Thanks for the reviews. (you'll find them at the bottom.) Well let's see what this chapter's called... just start reading. I don't have anything useful to say right now. Jane

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. I'm not putting in any new characters so i don't own them either.

Hate me now, Love me later

Chapter 2: A confession of feelings?

As soon as Kurama woke up and didn't find Hiei next to his bed, Kurama was worried. 'Where are you Hiei? You're usually here... right by my side. I hope that you're ok... it's 10:30! I only have a half hour to get ready! I promise that I'll be there for you... just wait for me... please wait...'

"You were almost late Kurama. That's just so not like you. Something wrong?"

"No. I just slept in is all. It is a weekend and everything."

"How late did you sleep in?"

"10:30. I know that's not usually like me, but i was just so tired. I never felt so tired in my whole life. Like i was going to explode or something... it was hard for me to keep my eyes open while i was in class for half a day. Man, i was just so out of it."

"Yeah. I'd say so. Don't keep me waiting. You said you wanted to talk to me about something important the last time we sat down and talked."

"Yeah. You left a note for me... that was unusual."

Hiei chuckled at Kurama's tone of voice. "Yeah. Though you know, that's how i really feel about you."

"What do you mean?"

"Try and remember the last line of the note Kurama."

"Your name."

Hiei sweatdropped. "NO! The line before that."

Kurama stained on his memory. Then suddenly he remembered. He had been meaning to ask Hiei about that this morning. Hiei had gotten to it first. The line was: "Love to you Kurama"

"What did you mean by that line Hiei?" Kurama demanded. Then he asked in a little voice, "Do you really love me?"

Hiei's eyes widened. Kurama _didn't _know! Hiei thought that he did. "Yes. Kurama, I really love you. Is that alright with you?"

Kurama had tears in his eyes. 'Yes, Hiei loves me too. He loves me... thank you Inari. Thank you.

"Kurama? You alright?"

"Yeah. I'm fine just a little surprised that you love me too."

"You love me!"

"Yes dummy. I've loved you for the longest time. I thought that the reason you stayed away is because you didn't want to be with me."

"No... never. I love you and _only you_ kurama. Only you reside in my heart."

"Want to celebrate?"

"With who?"

"Just us. Mom's going to be gone till the day after tomorrow. In fact I can stay home tomorrow to spend the day with you if you want."

"Yeah! Can we celebrate by eating sweet snow?"

"Of course. What kind do you want me to buy?"

"Chocolate. It'll be fun to spread on you Kurama... it'll be fun."

"No. Hiei, if we're going to sleep together, let's wait before we bring out the toys."

"Toys? I just want to eat you Kurama... isn't that alright?"

"No. Not this time. We're not playing games until after a few times..."

"How many times Kurama?" Hiei asked while licking Kurama's ears.

"A few... maybe 3... Hiei, can't that wait until we get home?"

"No. We're gonna have us a little fun right here and now... no compromise there... you're gonna be mine Kurama."

"No, Hiei! Don't!" Kurama shoved Hiei away sharply. "Not here. I love you but we can't just do it wherever the hell we feel like it! If you can't accept that, maybe you shouldn't come around until you can!"

"Am i just bugging you Kurama?"

"Only when you start acting like this... I'm sorry but i can't do it yet. We'll celebrate later. I need to be alone tonight. Maybe soon, but not now. Don't sleep by my bed tonight. It might tempt me. I don't want to get out of control."

"Isn't that the way it's supposed to be? Dangerous and wild? Aren't you supposed to lose control when you're around me?"

"No."

"To which question?"

"To all of them. Listen Hiei, if you promise to save the sex till we get home and let me moan in joy there we can do it tonight. If not, then go and don't come back to see me for a little while."

"I'll wait. As long as i can play a little before the actual event..."

"Ok. But not with the sweet snow."

"Hn. Fine. No sweet snow fun _this _time. We're gonna do that next time. Or I'm never going to make love with you."

"Fine deal. Let's go home."

"Ok. Let's go."

Kurama and Hiei held hands and walked home.

A/N: Yeah! This is going to be great. Just to let you know, this is one of the happiest parts of the story for a while. On the way home in the next chapter, they get into another big argument. Then Kurama gets grief stricken when he finds Hiei's body on the ground beat up. Blood is pouring out of his mouth and... ok I'm not giving out too much more information for my readers. I'll see you all later.

**Jessica- ok, here's more for you. Thankies for the review**

**Blackfox999- i might make one of them suffer more than the other, but they'll both be affected by it. Thanks for the review. **

**Very bad evil kitten- Thanks for the review and here's more for you too.**

Thanks for all who reviewed chapter 1. glares at non reviewers Jane!


	3. fighting bleeding and sadness

A/N: ok, well it's time for one of the characters to leave the other. Tragedy strikes the heart when Hiei is on the ground beaten up and he looks truly dead... That's all I'm telling you now.

Disclaimer: I don't own them. Don't try and convince me that i do because i don't.

Hate me now, love me later

Chapter 3: fighting and bleeding and sadness

Kurama and Hiei were walking home when suddenly Hiei had another idea about the sex they were going to have when they got home.

"Kurama, what about handcuffs?"

"What?" Kurama asked. They had been walking in silence for the last 15 minutes.

"For fun. We could use handcuffs."

"No. We're having regular sex first dummy. I told you. No we're not playing with toys now, or later tonight."

"Come on Kurama! It'll be fun! You know that you want to make our first time together as fun as possible."

"NO! I DON'T! I want it to be romantic and sexy. Not sweaty and all that work for nothing when all we're doing is playing. I thought we ended the subject with tonight, our first time together, we'd have regular sex and then during the next one we'd use sweet snow... Why can't we do that?"

"Kurama, it's not going to hurt us to have fun our first time together will it?"

"Hiei, it really might be fun for _you_ but really i just want us to spend time together as a couple." Kurama sighed. "Maybe this was a bad idea... having sex before our first date..."

Hiei was stunned to hear his Kurama talk like this. "Kurama..."

"Go Hiei. I'll talk to you in the morning."

"Kurama, please I didn't mean to make you so upset. Please Kurama, let me stay."

Kurama burst into tears. "Hiei, just go! I need to be alone right now!"

Hiei came over and wrapped his arms around Kurama. "It's alright my love, tell me what's wrong."

"YOU! You are what's wrong with me Hiei!" Hiei's eyes widened.

"Me?"

"Yes. Hiei you're just being to pushy for my liking. Please just go... just go. I'll talk to you later." Kurama said softly. 'I just need space Hiei. I don't want to pull out of this embrace, but i have to get you to go before I say something I'll truly regret. Go before I truly hurt you... Please don't make me hurt you my love...'

"Fine, you want me to leave so badly I will! Don't expect me to come back for a while, you hear me? Nor for a long while! I might even return to Demon World to get away from you since everything you told me is a lie!" Hiei cried out as he ran off. 'If you don't want me around, then why tell me that you love me? I don't care about you, even though that's a lie. I hate you for shoving me around, but i love you as well because i care for you so. Kurama, why did you break me? You hurt me badly! More than you know. I'll get my revenge on you soon enough. You'll know my pain as well as your own.'

Later that night Kurama sit upon his bed worrying constantly about his dearest Hiei. Kurama stared out his window and could still feel Hiei's hurt and pain. Kurama still hoped that Hiei wouldn't hold a grudge against him for not sleeping with him. All that Kurama really wanted was to keep Hiei form himself and for himself. Constantly Kurama had barely been able to control his urges to jump on Hiei and get into his pants. 'Just like earlier tonight. I never wanted to hurt him, but to make love to him in a fiery, passionate way. Didn't Hiei feel my desire or was he just ignoring it to make up fun games for him and me to play? Why won't Hiei just come back and say something like: "Oh, Kurama! I'm so sorry. Please forgive me, we can have regular sex tonight and tomorrow if you want. When you want to use toys let me know... I'll do anything for you Kurama. Really! That's how much I love you."' Kurama once again burst into tears at his own thoughts. Only these tears were tears of stupid thoughts. 'He won't be coming back for a while. No likely chance that he'll be back tonight. I was stupid to tell him off like that... I'll follow him and tell him I'm sorry. As soon as I find him that is.'

Kurama started tailing Hiei and then suddenly Hiei stopped. The emotions that Kurama had been following were fading and fast. 'Don't die on me bastard. If you do, I'll never forgive you!'

Kurama found Hiei laying on the ground inside an alleyway. Hiei was still breathing, but he had bruises and cuts on him. Several people must have beat him up. Slowly, Kurama took Hiei's head and put it into his lap. He stroked his hair and whispered sweet words to him. "Hiei, I'm sorry for pushing you away, but i could barely control myself to keep in line and jumping on you right there. Please forgive me. Hiei I'm so sorry for what I did." Hiei's breathing was slowing. "No you can't die yet. You leave me and I'll kill you again. You hear me? I'll kill you for dying."

A small trickle of blood started pouring out of hiei's mouth as Kurama picked him up and headed for home. 'He's gradually getting worse. Since he's a different breed of demon, I'm not sure what to do for him. I can't take him to a hospital without being asked more questions than I'd like. It seems like my only choice right now. Hopefully they won't take off that headband to find his 3rd eye. Then I'd have a lot of explaining to do... oh please Inari, please save him for me!'

A/N: ok so Kurama's going to take Hiei to the hospital. What good could come of that? Find out in the next chapter! I hope that you all won't kill me for this next question, but would you please review? I'll see you all later for the next chapter. It might be a while before i get this finished...sigh at the thought of more than 20 chapters fic Jane!

Reviews:

**shiorifoxiesmom: **Thanks for the review. And yes Kurama is a pervert, but in this fic, Hiei is the one with the more corrupted mind

**Griever Weapon: **Thanks for the review. Here's more for you!

**Hiei's Gothic Angel:** Thanks for reviewing! Twice! It means a lot to me and i appreciate the reviews! Both of the reviews made me laugh and when people review and make me laugh it means to me that you like the fic! Thanks a lot for the laughs. And one of them might die, but you never know!

**Very bad evil kitten: **Thanks again for the review. This one made me laugh! I like imagining Kurama covered with some flavor of Ice Cream and it makes me drool to. Hope you liked this chapter as well.!

4 reviews Yeah! It means a lot to me that people such as you review and read my stories! I can't tell you how much it means to me that you reviewed my stories and you haven't sent me any flamers yet! Yeah!


	4. Will Hiei forgive me or should I give up...

A/N: Ok well thanks again for the reviews... i didn't really think that this fic was going too well and i was kind of hoping that i could stop writing it since my writers block is being annoying and won't let me write anything! Period end of story! Now I'm just ranting. Since people like to read this fic and seem to enjoy it, I'll keep it up just for the people who review! glares at people who read it but don't review it Thanks and since i left you off on a cliffhanger I'll be nice and try my best not to do that this time. If i do you may all hunt me down and slaughter me with pineapples. Did anyone think that I'm killing off a character? dodges flying sharp things well don't worry, I'm not and if i tried i would lose faithful readers...well maybe not. I'll stop ranting now and let you read the next chapter... Jane! And as soon as i check my email, I'll put up the people who reviewed and thank them. This is getting long! Time for the fic itself...

Disclaimer: never, never, never.

Hate me now, love me later

Chapter 4: Will Hiei forgive me, or should I give up?

(This chapter is mostly from Kurama's POV and i hope that's ok with all of you. Sometime in this fic I'll be making a chapter that will be mostly from Hiei's POV, but not for a while. Thanks I just didn't want you to get confused at why I did that.)

Kurama took Hiei to the hospital in his car. 'Hold on Hiei, you'll be fine. I promise that if you die, I'll kill myself to be with you. I love you more than anything and I'll do anyting in my power to bring you back to me.' I thought as I started speeding down the highway towards the hospital. I used something called a glamour to hide his 3rd eye for now, but I'd have to do it every 6 hours to keep the eye hidden. I am the only one able to see it and the doctors won't be suspicious about it because there's nothing really wrong with him.

I had decided that it would be best if I took him on as a close relative of mine and I'd put him under a name, not my last name, but a name that wouldn't be of too much suspicion. I parked quickly and took hiei into the main doors of the Tokyo Hospital, and called for a doctor to help me. Suddenly a doctor came rushing toward me and took Hiei out of my arms and put him on a table to take him to the emergency room.

Then suddenly the doctor was asking me questions. "Where did you find him?"

"In an alley way near Shinjuku avenue. He is a close cousin of mine and he was on his way back to my house. He was really late so I went out to look for him. He doesn't know the area of Tokyo too well, so I knew that he'd be following main avenues. I saw a body in the alley and realized as I got closer that it was him. I rushed him over as soon as I brought my car out of the lot across the street and drove him here as soon as I could."

"You found him in this condition?"

"Yes." I answered

"Do you know of anyone who might have had anything against him?"

"No." I said starting to get frustrated.

"Ok, well we'll have to take a look and see what the extent of his injuries are. From the looks of it he may have some broken bones and possible eternal bleeding, but I strongly believe that he won't be dying today. He'll still have a while yet to live."

"Thank you doctor. That makes me feel better."

"I was hoping it would. Does your family have medical insurance?"

"Yes... but I'm the only one that it covers. Could I use that to pay for my cousin's medical bills?"

"Yes... we'll have to look it up on the computer and you're going to have to fill out some paper work for your family member. I'll go check on him and see what needs to be done on him and I'll let you know."

"Thank you." I answered grateful to the doctor. The doctor handed me a clipboard and asked me to fill out his entire name. I filled out the paperwork and handed it back to the doctor. I waited for a few hours and then the doctor came back to give me the news about Hiei. I stood up quickly when i sensed the doctor coming. "How is he?"

"He'll be alright... don't worry too much about him. He heals very quickly. We did find something unusual though." I held my breath. The eye shouldn't reappear or another hour or so. "It seems that he has an unusual nervous system... and the spine that connects his brain to the rest of the body is nearly cut in half, but he responds well to treatments and responds to sound and light. Someone in his condition shouldn't be able to really function, but some how he is able to. I want to tell you that the broken bones will mend, but it will take some time. In the condition he was in when you brought him here, he looked like he would keel over any time because he wasn't able to funtion, yet here he is breathing, talking, and responding to questions. He knows his first name, where you live and who the president of the united states is."

My eyes went wide with shock. How could Hiei know something as random as that? Unless. . . No he wouldn't know... did he really watch the T.V.?

"I'm joking. If he knew that I'd say to color me impressed. If you want, you can see him now. He's in the 5th room on the right down that hall." The doctor pointed down the hall. "Don't worry about him. He'll be fine." I quickly nodded my thanks and jogged down the hall. I found the 5th room on the right and it surely read Kitsuragi, Hiei. That was the name that I put down for him. I looked into the window of his room and found him asleep. Quietly I opened the door and walked into the room. Hiei looked better than he had when I'd found him.

I sat down on a chair and pulled it up to Hiei's bed. 'Hiei, please get better soon, i really need you to come back and be with me.' I took Hiei's hand in mine. "Please, Hiei. You can get better fast. The faster you get better the sooner we can be together. Please, Hiei, I'm so sorry for what i said to you. I need you with me..." Yusuke and Botan walked in. I quickly dropped the hand that I'd been holding. Yusuke came up and put a hand on my shoulder. "How ya holdin' up big guy?"

"I shouldn't have been so rash to Hiei. Look what happened to him because of me."

"Dude, it's ok. Hiei heals faster than a normal human right? Once he's better, you guys can be together again and you can make up with him."

I nodded. Tears sprung into my eyes and i bent my head to cry silently. "Kurama? You ok man?"

Yusuke asked me. I nodded even though it wasn't true. "So why are you crying? If you were alright you wouldn't be crying now would ya? Come on man! Tell me."

"Shhhhhh!" Botan told Yusuke. "You don't want to wake him up do you?"

"Yeah sorry."

"I'm crying because I'm finally happy." The others just looked at me with confusion written on their faces. "I'm happy because Hiei finally told me he loved me. But then we had a fight and he wanted to use toys for our first time together... i should've just said yes to the toys but i was being stubborn and didn't want to listen to him... i was being an idiot. After I told Hiei off, he actually went away and... i found him like this. I was a stupid idiot." I smiled sadly. 'I'm so stupid. I'm basically telling them, " Hey guess what? I'm gay! What do you think about that huh?" i can't believe that i just blurted out my feelings for Hiei in front of everyone else.'

I looked up at Yusuke and he just smiled at me with that stupid grin of his. "Hey man that's great! At least now you know how you really feel about each other. All of us could tell that Hiei had a major crush on you, but none of us knew how _you_ really felt about anyone. Now that we know, the rest of us are happy too. Listen Hiei looks like he's waking up so we'll go. You make up with him or I'll rip your head off. See ya."

"Bye Kurama."

"Bye." I said after they left.

Hiei looked up at me with sleepy eyes. "Kurama? That you? Where am I?"

"Yes, Hiei it's me. You're at the hospital. I found you and i didn't want you to die so i brought you here."

"You brought me here to save me?"

"Yes. If there's anything you want me to do for you just name it. Anything at all."

"Leave."

"Hiei please I just– "

"I just told you what i need. So please, will you leave?"

"Ok. I'll be back later though."

"No guarantee that I'll talk to you."

"I know. If you need me for anything at all– "

"Leave."

I got up and silently walked out of the room. Yusuke and Botan had already left. With no one around i transformed into Youko and dashed out of the hospital with tears running down my cheeks.

A/N: Ok! I leave you there because it might be an evil place to leave off, but my mind went dead right after i finished this chapter. I'm going to start the next chapter soon. When my mind returns i might start to get the ideas flowing better but i don't have much in the way of those right now. The plot badger will come back eventually but right now he decided to go on a little vacation. I should be updating this fic soon, but it could be around 3 weeks before i get around to it. Please forgive me. I've been working on a lot of different things and that includes homework. I'll try and finish it soon so that you can get back to reading and reviewing the chapters. (Hint Hint!) Well, I'll stop raving now and let you get back to your lives. Reviews below this. Jane!

Reviews

**very bad evil kitten: **Hiei will get better and well, before we can get to the good parts of this yaoi fic, let's just say that i have to make them suffer just a little... sorry and thanks a lot for the review!

**Shiorifoxiesmom** Thanks for noticing that they're both emotional roller coasters and Thanks a lot for the review. I hope that you liked this chapter as well

**Hiei's Gothic Angel (aka Jabu)** thanks for the review and it was another one that made me laugh. You may ramble on for a long time. I read the whole thing of everything that i read so it took a little longer than most reviews, but it still makes my day to get reviews no matter how long they are. I hope that you liked this chapter and that you won't be too upset at the next chapters.

Another A/N: Ok, just to let all you non reviewer people out there, i like reviews and it makes me and more my day when I see those posted on my stories. Thanks a lot and i hope that you are having fun reading the stories. Don't matter to me whether or not you like it, i just want reviews. I'm joking about all the stuff execpt the parts about them making my day. If i don't update in a week feel free to attack my email with hateness for not updating for a while. Just as long as you don't cuss me out i won't hold it against you. I feel the need for food so I'll finish the 5th chapter as soon as 5 reviews come in for this fic.


	5. You'll see me soon Kurama

A/N: ok, Well I'm already on chapter 5 everyone! Apparently this is going to be more than 5 chapters! Is that a good or bad thing? I'll hopefully finish this one soon, because I'm finally getting ideas for another YYH Fic. I have an idea of what it's gonna be called, but I'm not gonna tell you until I'm about 3/4 of the way through this fic (if i ever know where that point is) i want to start writing it, but this is one of my top priorities and as soon as I manage to get the next couple chapters up, I'll be continuing on another few of my fics. I thank everyone who reviewed and I'll put you faithful people at the bottom... you know who you are my faithful readers. I got one new person to review. As soon as 2 more **different** people review I'll put up chapter 6 which is about 1/3 of the way done and already 3 pages... sweatdrop and sigh it's a good thing for you readers because you get to read a long chapter for once! I'll stop talking now because I could go on forever but if I do, you'll never stop me. I hope that you like this chapter as well as the others... Jane!

Disclaimer: hmmmm let me think about it. When Hiei and Kurama get married in the anime. That's when I'll own it Since that never happens, I guess that I don't get to own it.

Chapter 5: You'll see me soon Kurama

(shorter A/N: this chapter is more from Hiei's POV for you. It's only fair that hiei gets one too since Kurama got one.)

I sat in my hospital bed awaiting news of when i could leave. It's been 3 days since i last saw Kurama and he hasn't been back since. Tears sprung to my eyes thinking about it. I'd been so cold to the person I love and I saw the hurt in his eyes after i asked him to leave. Being alone like this, it's more lonely than i thought it would be. Oh, Kurama! If only you'd come back and see me. The humans in this place say that i have to stay here for another week before I'm even allowed to ask about leaving again. I tried to escape, but when I realized that I was too weak to even move really, I gave up and let them do their treatments on me without writhing in pain or complaining afterward about how much pain they caused me. The doctor says I'm just putting on a brave face and that it really does hurt. It stings on occasion, but in the reality of it, it really doesn't feel painful.

As much as I want Kurama to come back and see me, I just want to go back and let him know the truth about the whole incident. I tried to kill myself. I released the dragon from my arm and let it try and kill me. I was in so much emotional pain it was hard to keep myself alive for much longer. Being forced to stay int this awful place has made me look back on the incidents of my life and I realized that i could never be happy with Kurama. Not really. I tried to convince myself that my life would be better without Kurama in it, but it was nearly impossible. I love that fox with all my heart and that's not something that i can really change. Somehow, that kitsune crept his way into my heart and that fulfilled my very needs. Without Kurama by my side, it makes me feel incomplete. I'm not whole without my other half, Kurama. 'Thank you for making me realize my mistakes. Now that I've been good and finally gotten over the fact that we started fighting again, will you come back to me?' I thought.

After a couple more days, Kurama decided it was time to come and see me. He knocked gently on my door. I opened my eyes. I'd just woken up from a short sleep. "May I come in?" Kurama asked me kind of shyishly. "Or do you want me to keep leaving you alone?" It's been a week since Kurama had last seen me. I smiled gently. I was still slightly tired. The pain comes and goes, and when Kurama entered all pain, emotional and physical, evaporated and i was joyous.

"You can come in Kurama." I looked down not wanting to meet him in the eyes. "Kurama. I have to tell you the truth. I really missed you." I looked up at him and saw tears in his eyes. "It's been so hard to stay away from you Hiei! I wanted to come everyday for the last week and see if you'd forgive me." Kurama started to cry and i pulled on his hand and led him to the bed. He sat his head against my shoulder and cried. Gently I stroked his hair and whispered gentle words into his ear. "I'm ok now. If you want, I'll tell you why I was in that alley way. After I tell you, I'm not too sure how you'll react. Shocked first most likely and then angry with me. Please Kurama, please. I'm sorry for all the crap that I've put you through."

"Hiei? What is it? What do you need to tell me?"

"Kurama, I tried to kill myself."

Kurama was shocked at my words. "You tried to kill yourself? I don't understand. Why would you do that?"

I looked at my hands avoiding the view of Kurama's gaze. "I don't know exactly. I was just so depressed over our fight and i thought that you didn't want to be with me so i decided to try and rid myself from you for good. I never thought i was going to go that far, but it seemed like the only way that i could give you peace. I never meant for it to go that far, but I didn't want us to fight anymore so I decided to end it."

"By ending your life!How can you even think about it so easily like that? What were you thinking? That I'd be happy with you deciding to kill yourself? Hiei, I love you no matter what you try and do. I want you to be a happy person with me. The doctor said that I can take you home tomorrow. Do you want to get out of this place then?"

I smiled. He didn't need answers to those questions right now. If he pushed I'd tell him then. "Yeah, Kurama, i do. Get me out of here. I'm sick of wearing this dress thing. The sooner i get out of this place, the happier that I'll be. I'll be happier as long as I'm with you Kurama. That's what will make me happy. Can you keep me happy until i decide to leave and pursue something else."

Kurama looked at me like i was using him as a toy or something. I laughed gingerly. "I'm joking Kurama. I'd spend the rest of my life with you. I love you and i know that being with you is the right thing. Thank you." I smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Kurama had taken my hand and he let it drop. "Ok. Be sure to get rest. If you don't... It'll be up to me to sort out the punishment." Kurama grinned like a cat. "I'll see you tomorrow."

That grin sent shivers of pleasure down my spine. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it was kind of unusual. Kurama didn't really have that kind of effect on me.

The next day...

"Yeah! I'm out of this place finally!" I stretched my arms into the air and i saw Kurama's mom standing near the car in the parking lot.

"Hiei, it's nice to see you again." She greeted me.

"It's good to see you again. I need to talk to you when we get to the house. Is that alright with you two? Kurama? Kurama's mom."

"Yes." The both answered at the same time. The car ride home was long and fulfilling. I felt more whole than i had in weeks. I looked up at the house that Kurama and his mother lived in. This is my home. Finally, i found a place to call 'home.' Kurama, Thank you for letting me be with you. I smiled and looked around. From now on I'd be living here with my love and finally i was complete. You, my love made me complete. I sighed and walked into my new home.

A/N: Ok this is good again! I thought that the sad stuff would last for a longer time than this but oh well. The 6th chapter as i said is well underway and I'm so happy that this is becoming even better than what i thought! Finally i made a chapter that i like. I appreciate the fact that you keep up with the story and I'll see you all later because I'm getting kicked off the computer for now!

6th chapter preview: Kurama finally let me stay here. I'm going to talk to his mom soon.

"Mom?"

"Oh Hiei come and sit down."

"Can i start dating Kurama?"

He he I'm evil! Well ponder over this and then well, ponder more. Reviews at the bottom like usual. Jane 'till 6!

Reviews:


	6. Time to talk it over with the parents

A/N: chapter 6 it's time. Hiei has already met Kurama's mom but she doesn't know that her son is in love with a man! shock horror gasp! it's not really that surprising to us (apparently) and we all love the fact that they're together and a happy couple. Am I right? hears cheers in the background saying that I'm right Ok enough, that's it for now. I can't type but maybe with you're help **reviewers** i can type better and faster to satisfy your needs to read the fic hears more cheering also this is an extra long chapter! I hope that you enjoy it as well as I did. Jane!

Disclaimer: Not me own them (believe me that i did that on purpose so don't say that i used incorrect grammar because i know that. I felt like being an idiot for a minute.)

Chapter 6: Time to talk it over with the parents

(This is also from Hiei's POV and it's kind of unusual this chapter is... I'll see you at the end of course.)

I sat on the bed that Kurama had lent me and was thinking about what I was going to do now. Could we live in the same house and sit at the same table together around his family and not draw attention to the fact that we're in love with one another? Would the family kick me out if we confessed that we're not just friends anymore, but in fact that we love each other with all our hearts? Would Kurama's family turn him away? Would they shun me for being the _guy_ that kurama's dating? These and more questions rolled through my mind as I was trying to decide what I would do about this.

At dinner that night we talked about me and how Kurama and I had met. We told them we were friends from different schools. We'd met one day at the arcade after we'd finished with our daily studies and gradually became friends. I told them about the first time that I'd met Kurama. Most of the story was a lie. What was I supposed to say? That I'm a demon from the demon world that fell in love with your son after knowing him for so long? How ridiculous would that sound coming form me? I made myself a year older than Kurama and that soon I'd be starting my first year of college, as soon as I finished signing up for one.

"So Hiei, where are you going to go?"

"I'm not to sure yet. I'm thinking about just getting a job somewhere for a few years, you know get a good bank account behind me, then start college."

"It sounds reasonable. You're welcome to stay here for as long as you want as long as you can cloth yourself." Kurama's mother told me.

"It'll be great to have another person around that Shuiichi can talk to. In reality, what i believe is that Kurama never really did have many true friends. He went out with a couple of girls for a few months at a time, but broke off with them because they weren't his type. I always wondered if... never mind. I'm just glad that Shuiichi has you for a friend." Kurama's mom told me.

"Mother!"

Kurama's mom just waved her hand up and down. "It's true though you know."

"Yeah yeah." Kurama muttered and retook his place at the table. I had a hard time keeping my composure with the look that Kurama had on his face. Finally after a certain amount of time and staring at that angelic face of his, I couldn't hold it in any longer. Suddenly in the middle of dessert, I burst out laughing.

"Hiei! What's wrong?" Kurama's mother asked me worriedly.

"It's his face! Your face, Kurama it was so funny! I just can't stop laughing at the face that you made!"

"Why'd you call Shuiichi 'Kurama' Hiei?"

Realization hit me. I thought up and said the next thing that came into my head. "It's a nickname. I don't know why I call him Kurama, but the name seems to suit him in some way. I liked it for Shuiichi. I hope that you don't mind. It's what I've been calling him for quite a few months."

Kurama's mom's face relaxed. She seemed relieved. "Yes it's fine. I was just confused. You're right it does seem to suit him in a weird way." She sighed. "Well, it's late and Kurama you have school in the morning. Let's go to bed." We went to bed and with 'Kurama' laying beside me, I got a good night's sleep.

The next morning...

I was in my own bed and Kurama was gone. I looked at the clock hanging on the wall. It read 9:30. Kurama left over an hour ago for school. I sensed Kurama's mother in the kitchen. I swept into the kitchen after a quick shower. The thing that had bugged me about his family was that his mom asked me to call her just that. 'Mom' that's what she wanted me to call her.

"Morning mom."

"Morning. I figured that you'd be up with Shuiichi. It seems that you were more tired that you thought. Shuiichi let you sleep." She smiled. "That was nice of him. You looked like you needed sleep after the night that you had."

I had no choice but to really smile back. She was so kind and I didn't have the ability to dislike her. "Listen can I talk to you later this week about something?"

"Of course. Do you want to talk now?"

"No. Sorry to run out on you, but I've got to meet a few of my other friends to make plans with them this weekend. It might be just lunch or something. Is it alright if I go out for now?"

"Yes. Just be back for lunch."

"You never know with Genkai..."

"Who's that?"

"Oh, she's my aunt. She's really nice. I've got to go and see her so I might not be back for lunch." I grimaced at turning down his mom for lunch... she was an amazing cook after all.

Once again all she did was smile with that smile of hers. "Ok. If you're not back for dinner you realize I'll have your head on a platter and I'll feed it to my son right?"

I laughed with great joy. "Yeah. I know how much you want me to be a friend to your son so I will." I waved and made my way out of the door.

A few days later after his visit with Genkai

"Kurama! I need to talk with you now!" I called from the upstairs bedroom that we shared. Kurama had been downstairs studying.

Kurama fled up the stairs in a panic. For some odd reason I was able to feel his emotions.

"Hiei! What's wrong? Were you just attacked?" Then Kurama shook his head. "No you said that you needed to talk to me. What's wrong? I was just in the middle of my math homework."

I sighed. He'd probably tell me the same thing that he's been telling me for the last 2 days.

"When are we telling her Kurama?"

"Soon I promise. Do you want to do it? You seem so eager to tell her, so why don't you do it?"

"I don't want her to get angry with me and kick me out of the house. I really like it here. I don't want to leave... I want to stay with you Kurama."

He sighed in frustration and exasperation. "She won't kick you out. If she does, since you have a job and can get your own apartment, I'll move in with you. She can't keep us apart even if she wanted to." Kurama bent down and kissed me long and soft on the lips. "If she can't accept the fact that her son is gay, then she'll have to live without him until she can accept the fact." He kissed me again. This time when he broke off it was because we heard the door slam.

"Shuiichi! Why aren't you doing your homework?"

"It's not due until Thursday mom!"

"Ok. I want it finished by tomorrow you hear me son?"

"I hear you mother. I'll finish it later ok?"

"What are you two doing?"

"Watching a movie." I replied for Kurama since I'd been watching one earlier and the DVD was still in the player.

Kurama's mom walked up and opened the door. " Oh, you're watching **_The House of Flying Daggers_**. That was a good movie. Listen you two, I have to go out on a trip again. I'll be back in a week and a half. Do you think that you can fend for yourselves in the way of food and washing your clothes. I don't think it matters too much considering that you're on break Kurama and Hiei you don't have work until night right?"

"Mostly," I answered. "but since Shuiichi would be home I'll ask if i can work the day shift instead of the night. Kurama and I are mostly night people as it is."

"Oh, alright. It'll be about a 12 hour flight to America, but I'll call you as soon as I can ok? I'm packed and I'm leaving for the airport at 7:30. Ok?"

"Yes. Mother we'll manage to find things around here to do. Right Hiei?"

"Yes." I replied and smiled at him.

We left after Kurama's mom's flight had taken off and we decided to go home. I took Kurama's hand as he drove us home.

**A/N: ok this isn't the real thing but i have to switch to Kurama's POV for the next part and I'm hoping that these next scenes won't make you stop reading it. It might just turn into lime, but I'm trying, again, my hand at lemon. For me it's hard to write. I'll try again. If you were hoping for some good sex scenes it may be or may not be you're lucky day. If I don't succeed please don't hate me for it.**

**Now for Kurama's POV.**

As we rode home I felt Hiei take my hand. At the next light that was red, I leaned over and kissed him lightly on the lips. "As soon as we get home, what do you say to some good old plain-fashioned sex. Maybe tomorrow then we can play with toys."

"Sounds good to me." Hiei replied kissing my neck. The light changed and we drove off to my house. When we got inside many things started happening all at once.

We slowly made our way up to my bedroom.

Hiei was kissing me with a passion that I never knew existed. He was so needy, so hungry. His desire came off of him in waves. The impulse to throw him down was increasing with each time that he started to touch me in any way. Finally after an eternity of kissing, Hiei was sliding a hand up my shirt and massaging my chest.

More than ever i wanted to throw him down but I didn't want to rush either of us.

'Hiei is so magnificent like this.' i thought as Hiei started sucking on spots of my chest.

'_But you want to be the one to do this. You want to be the master of the prey.' _Youko said inside my head.

'No I don't. I want Hiei to be comfortable. That's all that I want for him.'

'_But is it really? Do you just want him to be comfortable? Or do you lie to yourself and know that you want to be the one on top?' _

'What I want for Hiei is the same for myself. I want you to leave me alone.'

'_Listen to me child. That will never happen. I live inside you, so that's something that you can't change about me. All you want from him is the same for me. You don't love him, you just want him as a lover. That's all that you care about. If you were a real demon, you would be the one doing this to Hiei, not the other way around.'_

"Hiei? Why'd you stop?" I asked my pleasure going away faster than I wanted.

"You had a look in your eyes telling me to stop. Are you afraid that I'll hurt you?"

"No. I just want you to be the one to do this at first. If you let me, I'll take control and I might hurt you." I said with a sad, but happy voice.

Hiei just smiled at me "Thank you Kurama." He said, then continued what he had been doing.

With my lips on his neck, Hiei started to unbutton the jeans that I was wearing. Slowing down some, Hiei took my clothes off of me and started his pleasure torture. He started to suck on me in a lot of places. With him sucking on me and me continually moaning under the pressure of my crotch area Hiei was finally finished. When I finally got to have my way, Hiei was undressed and laying in bed. I'd gotten up, still naked from my time with Hiei, and gotten something to drink.

My finishing meant that our first time together, sexually and utterly romantically was over.

When we got up the next morning we were content with each other's company and Hiei came over and kissed me on the neck. "Morning darling." with his tone, you'd have thought that it was anyone **but **Hiei. Everything was going well. Finally now that we'd slept together, we were a true couple. Just as we had sat down to breakfast the phone rang. I answered it and was surprised to hear Yusuke's voice on the other end.

"Hey, Kurama, how're things going with Hiei?"

"Better. We had fun last night huh?"

"Yeah, who's on the phone? I don't care. Just hang up and tell whoever it is that you'll call them back later." Hiei told me a little bit demandingly.

I just laughed. "Hey apparently Hiei wants to eat breakfast so I'll call you back ok?"

"Yeah. Me and Botan want full details about last night. If you don't give them I'll kill you."

"Ok. I'll talk to you later.

I sat the phone back in the phone jack and sat back down to the table to enjoy a breakfast with Hiei. When he left for work, I called Yusuke back and told him to get Botan and make their way over here.

"Hello Yusuke, hello Botan. Have you both been well?"

"Yes Kurama thanks for asking. I've been very well."

"Hey man. Yeah I'm fine."

Both of them were staring at me and i knew what they came for.

"Hiei and I slept together." I said with a blush on my face.

"Congratulations! We knew how you two felt about each other, but you wouldn't either admit it to yourself, or you refused to tell Hiei. I'm so happy that you two finally got together."

"How'd it happen anyway?" Yusuke asked me.

After I'd given them full details they were both staring at me mouths in gape mode.

"It's not that shocking is it?"

"... to us it is. Kurama, if Youko doesn't accept the relationship, there's no telling what he might do to keep you two away from each other... we want to keep you together, but the only way to get rid of youko is to kill yourself, and we can't have that." Botan said to me worriedly.

I sat with my hands folded in my lap. Botan was not without wisdom. I thought about the situation seriously. I'd have to do something about this soon. It is not to be taken into account lightly. "I know what I'll have to do now."

**A/N: now once again I am forced to switch POV's once again because if i don't it won't work for the preview that i promised for you all. If i don't add that in the chapter what would be the point of the preview? Well, once again it is going to be from Hiei's POV and it works out well for the (what i hope is the end) of the chapter. **

**Jane again!**

I walked home from my regular night-time job. Kurama's mother had come home the day before and whether Kurama was with me or not, I was going to ask her if Kurama and I could start seeing each other.

I was going to talk to her that night. It was after dinner and Kurama said that he needed to go to bed early to be ready for his final exams in the morning.

"Mom?"

"Oh Hiei come and sit down."

"Can i start dating Kurama?"

Slowly Kurama's mom looked at me closed her eyes and sighed. "I thought that you two had feelings for each other, but i didn't think that it was true until right now." She looked at me. "What else do you have to tell me about you and my son?"

"We slept together."

"You mean you had sex with him."

I looked at the ground. I knew that she wouldn't understand. "Yes."

"I see." she closed her eyes again. "I didn't think that you would have slept with him so soon. Without even telling me that you had feelings for one another. I just never thought that my only son would turn gay on me. I was happy to be blessed with a child, but I was hoping he would be... normal."

"Being gay isn't normal!" I demanded with a tone that might've been a little harsh.

"I didn't mean it like that. Shuiichi has always been sort of an oddball in his own little way. I want him to be happy, so I'll allow the both of you to see each other as long as you're both being careful."

I nodded.

"I'm so sorry for not telling or asking you sooner. I wanted to talk to you about it that morning, really, but I had appointments and other things that needed to be taken care of. I didn't mean to cause you pain."

"You haven't. I want to make a request though, on Shuiichi's behalf."

"Of course. I'd do anything to keep Shu happy."

"Shuiichi has a fragile heart and he falls in love easily. If he didn't want to be with you, you'd know it. I can't help but wonder if you have other people as friends that might question your relationship with my son. If you have friends like that, please don't hurt him by hanging out with them too much. Can you promise me that?"

I nodded slowly. I was trying to understand. Who did i have as a friend that i might hug on occasion? No one came to mind. If Yukina found out I was her brother, i might hug her, but I'd never come on to her in any way for the fact that I love Kurama and well, she's my sister. Nothing will keep me from Kurama unless... no would he? Youko? Would he try and keep me and the person that I love more than anyone else in the world apart?

A/N: Ok It's official. I'm the most evil person in the world. I leave you to wonder... without a preview. I'll put the reviewers from the last few chapters up in the next chapter. I'd acknowledge you, but its 1:29 my time and well, I'm really tired. If i get around to it, I'll repost this chapter with the reviews, but I'll just put them in the next chapter. I'll leave now, because i feel like I'm going to fall over from the tiredness. makes a note to self that says never to stay up this late finishing writing a chapter of a fic Jane till 7! I love you all and i hope that you liked this chapter. I'll stop talking now and let you review, and I can get some sleep. Jane...


	7. Don't hurt him Youko

A/N: ok this is chapter 7. As you probably noticed this chapter is quite a bit shorter than the last one. You're lucky that i finally got around to getting that chapter done. I hope that parts of it weren't too dull because my hand at lemon... as you probably noticed, really isn't very good. They finally slept together and both of them (to some extent) are afraid that Youko will drive them apart. Time for the good news, bad news game. I'll post the good news first.

The good news is: that Youko will try, almost succeed, but doesn't manage to get the two of them apart, and that this will be at least a 10 chapter fic.

The bad news is: writer's block has struck again and i could barely finish writing this chapter, the despair is really yet to come, and the chapters will be shorter for the next few of them.

Begging: Don't kill me pleasedodges sharp flying objects

_Blah_ is either voice in head or a flashback

Chapter 7: Don't hurt him Youko!

Hiei and Kurama progressed within themselves and both of them were worried about Youko possibly driving them apart. When they finally decided to talk about it, it was good because Kurama's mom had to go out of town again. After a few weeks of her son and his lover dating, she had finally accepted the fact that her son was dating a man.

"Hiei, we really need to have a talk. And don't ask about what because we both know what it's about."

I just sighed. "I know. It's about Youko right?" I said worriedly and being very tired.

Kurama looked at me with widened eyes. "You fear he'll try and drive us apart too?"

"I don't fear it..."

"_Yes you do. You fear it very greatly."_

"But I need to have reassurance that he won't be able to succeed in getting us apart."

"_No you don't. You want Youko to drive you two apart so you can have him. You want YOUKO! Not the 'Kurama' part of him, the Youko part of him. Don't you?"_

"No. I just need to make sure that Youko won't try and stop me from loving you."

I'm talking to the voice in my head. I'm going crazy and it's really not that funny any more. I need help. Kurama!

"Hiei? Are you alright?" The real Kurama looked at me slightly nervous.

"Yeah, fine. Really I'm fine. Don't worry about me." I told him with a I'm- too-happy look on my face.

"Hontoni?"

"Hai!"

_Listen to yourself. Your answering to a person who doesn't give a rat's ass whether you exist or not. Just embrace yourself. Accept that all you want is Youko. That's the only thing that will keep him from loving you. He'll never accept you for yourself. He sees you as you are: the Forbidden child of the Ice people. You mean nothing to the 'Kurama' that you care so much for. The only thing that he wants is to use you as a sex slave, a toy, and then discard you like nothing ever went on between you two. You don't have a real place, because all you are is a stupid, short child who can't accept what really lies within his heart!_

No! Your wrong. You just have to be. I love Kurama, and only Kurama truly. If i have to give myself up to be with him, so be it. Kurama, Youko. Both of you listen to me now. "Kurama don't talk for a few minutes ok?" Kurama only nodded as to heed to my request.

"Listen to me Youko. I love Kurama for him. If you want to be with me, then find a different me to be with. Don't come between us or I may have to kill you. Youko, Kurama has an entirely different soul apart from yours so if I have to kill him, I'll kill myself to be with him." I finished basically just shouting at Youko through Kurama's body. He just looked at me stunned. "... Ummmm... Hiei?"

"Yeah?"

"What was that all about?"

After I'd finished explaining about the voice, Kurama had told me that he had had a similar experience during our conversation as well.

flashback

"_You fear he'll try and drive us apart too?"_

_I know that you do, Kurama._

"_Of course I do. Why would you drive the two of us apart? You know how Hiei and I feel about each other."_

_Yes I do. Yet, you really need to learn to survive without him. You depend on him. You know the facts. You can't live without him by your side. Don't worry about it so much. I just want the personality that is being locked up inside him._

"_You know as well as I do that you can't have him. You can't hurt him. You know that I wouldn't let you."_

_You wouldn't be able to stop me. Period, and that's the end of the story._

"_I can stop you. I've done it before. You don't really want to make me angry again do you? You remember what happened last time you made me angry don't you?"_

_Of course. You trapped me and didn't talk to me for oh so long. It was such a tragedy. If you couldn't tell, I was being sarcastic._

"_Oh, I could tell. It wasn't really all that hard you know."_

_Shut up. I'm going to win and well, I'll win._

"_No because I won't let you."_

_You won't really have a choice in the matter. You can't hurt me now. The fact that you count on me is the fact that you keep up with me. There's also the fact that you release the real you, meaning me, on more than occasionally. If you really want a choice in the matter, just give up your body and let me have it. Besides, I bet Hiei is a great lover._

"_We've only slept together once."_

_But you liked it didn't you? When you felt him beneath you, having the power, you must have liked it. _

"_..."_

_By your silence, you must know that you won't stand a chance against that argument. You'll have your fun for a while, but when I get your body, don't be expecting me to give it up so easily. I'll have my way, and eventually the dark side of your lover boy will belong to me._

"_DON'T YOU DARE HURT HIM YOUKO! DON'T YOU DARE!"_

_Kid, I'll be seeing you around._

A/N: Ok this was an interesting chapter... youko is driving them apart or will be soon? ... I'm making this slightly more confusing than I hoped that it would become. I can't thank the people that review this fic constantly enough. There's a total of reviews for this fic and it makes me very happy! The list of people who reviewed and seem to like it so far...

Her awsomeness Bridget Depp (hope I spelled that right)- Thanks for the review again.

Very bad evil kitten- Thanks for the advice, and I read some really scary graphic lemon ones to try and get me started, but I just have this little problem with the people that live in my head to where unless they want to be written about in sex scenes, they won't let me write the scene. I know I'm strange, but it's just the way I am. Thanks for the review.

Hiei's gothic angel- Thanks for the review and once again, it made me laugh. I thank you and sorry that it took so long to update. I hope you'll read the other series of YYH I have running as well and review that too. I'm crazy and you act kind of like me in real life. Thanks for laughs and hope to see another review for this chapter

Tsukikitsune- Thanks for the review, but really there isn't a lot of detail in it. sweat drop thanks though. Everything is going according to story line for this fic. I was hoping to do that sooner, but I... I'll be quiet now.

Griever Weapon- Thanks for the review and I hope that you liked this chapter as well.

BattosaiLover2004- Sorry for the length of the update times, but the computer is evil and well, here is the thing that you were looking for.

Yeah a whole 6 people reviewed. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. All you people rock. I give you hugs, puppies and Ice cream. The reason for that is because it's already getting hotter down here almost everyday and it's kind of hard to get that to work. I'm happy that I finally got this chapter done because it's been bugging me for a while and people were bugging me on my email to hurry the hell up. I'm not going to mention any names of course. I hope that in the meantime of waiting for me to post the next chapter you'll read the other series that I have currently. It's based off of the one shot fic that I did called **Just need a place to spend the night.** This is going to be a trilogy called **May you be mine** and the first part is called** roses and thorns.**

The first part is mainly from Kurama's POV. And of course the characters are OOCness. I hope that you don't mind. I'll stop now because if I go on any longer I"ll be dead and falling asleep. Time here is 12:14. Tired need sleep for preparing for cross country running for next year... night and review and read the other fic I currently have up.


	8. Love and Hope aren't my friends anymore

A/N: I'm such a ditz. I almost forgot to finish this chapter before posting it. You can tell how tired I was that day... it's a different day. I"m sorry for the delay and the lack of posting. It took forever for the writers block to go away, and even longer for me to like this chapter. I scraped it at least 4 times before I was happy with it. You can tell that I read my own works to try and make sure that my readers like it too. yet another sweatdrop I hope that I make you happy for the next chapter.. Meaning this one. You won't be happy with me for long, because one of the characters might get raped... or in the sense. It's not going to be pretty or happy. It's going to be dreadful for that character. I'm not telling and the preview at the end won't be able to give it away either. The person(s) who get(s) the character will get the next chapter dedicated to them. I want to let you know I've set the standards for this fic. It will be 15 chapters. We still have a bit to go, but quite a lot to cover within 8 chapters. I'm counting this one as well just so you know. I'll stop talking and let you read. This is important. Please Review or I'll fell rejected. Please people who have been waiting for so long, don't give up hope on me yet. I"ll finish this series one way or another. As usual, reviews at the bottom. Ja!

Chapter 8: Hope and Love aren't my friends anymore.

Hiei and Kurama stayed together, but each was distant of the other. Both thought the other was going to eventually leave, but they both stayed around and kept basically the same attitude around each other. Finally, Kurama was getting sick of the silence between them during meals and movies. Hiei rarely talked about the things that were going on with him anymore and Kurama needed to get some answers. Those answers needed to be soon.

"Hiei, we really need to talk." Kurama brought up the subject another time.

"We don't really. It's fine like it is." Hiei answered the same. He was being more distant than usual, like there was something that he had been meaning to tell him, but couldn't bring himself to tell Kurama. It hit Kurama. Hiei had never told him that he loved him. Sure, Hiei showed him affection, but had he ever said it? Kurama racked his brain trying to find an answer. "Hiei, do you love me?" Kurama asked.

"Hn."

"No, give me a real answer." Kurama said in response to Hiei's non response. 'Doesn't he love me? If he doesn't, why would he have stayed with me? If he loves me, he would tell me right?'

"Kurama, I've been wanting to give you a real response, but it has been really hard to completely sort out my feelings about you and Youko and if it was really just you I wanted. I finally figured it out. I love you Kurama, but there's something else that you have to know. I'm not quite sure if you remember, but it's something that happened a long time ago." Hiei paused to look at Kurama's expression. He looked confused, not quite sure what to think.

"Hiei, you– what do you mean?" Kurama asked him.

"When I told you a while ago that I really loved you, back then, it didn't feel like it does now. To some extent, I did love you, but I wasn't sure of my own feelings. I think that I partially made it up. I have to be sincere when I say that I don't know if I really did love you then." Again he paused. He sighed and looked at Kurama with sincere eyes. "Right now Kurama, the real way I feel about you is mostly like this: I love you with all my heart and if anything ever happened to you, I wouldn't be able to live with myself." Hiei looked at him with tearful eyes. "I can't lose you now. You are my Kurama, and I can't leave you now. Please forgive me for not telling you all of this sooner."

Kurama smiled and took Hiei into his arms. "I know that. I feel almost the exact same way. If I lost you, I'd be broken down and wouldn't want to let anyone else near me for a long, long time. If you left for some reason because of me, I would start thinking in a way that would make me think that you didn't trust me anymore and that no one else would be able to trust me anymore. Koi, I love you and hope you'll stay with me for a long time." Kurama said just before he kissed Hiei close on the mouth hoping for entrance. Hiei allowed his tongue inside and moved his mouth in time with Kurama's.

Later that night

Hiei lay in bed listening to Kurama's contented breathing. 'How am I going to tell him that I'm only after Youko? It's not like he'll give to that side of him so easily that I'll be with him. It's confusing. Why do I want Youko over Kurama? Kurama cares so much more about me than Youko ever would and is so much nicer. Maybe I just need someone who would be rough with me when we slept together that it would seem more fun for me.' Hiei moved his arm to lay over his eyes. 'What the hell am I thinking? I would never want to have Youko over Kurama. I just must be extremely tired. I'm going to try and get some sleep without waking up Kurama. It's been a long day for him.' Hiei thought as he snuggled up close to Kurama's chest.

Kurama took him in his arms, sighed and fell back asleep. Kurama didn't know the real danger that would be soon discovered about a son he never knew he had.

The next morning

Kurama woke up to find the Hiei that would normally be laying in his arms sleeping out in the tree. No, not sleeping, gazing around. He saw Hiei's eyes lock on the window and a small smile appeared on his face. He opened the window and jumped back inside.

"Were you out there the whole night?" Kurama asked pulling Hiei against him, an arm around his waist.

"No. I went out earlier to train and then watched over you and the house." Hiei paused and stood on tip-toe to give Kurama a kiss gently on the lips. Then he looked at Kurama with interest.

"Daijobu desu ka?"

"Hmm? Oh, hai. Daijobu. Doshite?"

'Because you're acting weird' Hiei thought. " You looked confused about something. I just wanted to know if anything was bothering you or not."

"No. I'm fine. What were you doing in the way of training?" Kurama asked looking across the room.

"Nothing much. Running around attacking random things," Hiei said and interrupted Kurama before he could say anything. "and don't worry. I didn't attack anything moving. No kittens, no ningens, no thing living and moving at the same time are harmed. Only grass, tree trunks and bushes are hurt." Kurama sighed. "Stop attacking nature. You know how I feel about that."

"Speaking of nature," Hiei said taking out a boquet of roses and handing them to Kurama. "These are for you."

"Hiei! You know that you didn't have to. Thank you, they're lovely." Kurama told him kissing Hiei and sniffing the roses.

" I had a feeling that you would like them. They just seem to fit you, seeing as how you use the rose whip in almost every battle. I thought that you would need to have some back ups."

"I summon them out of no where."

Hiei's eyes widened in shook. "No where? Really? How cool!"

Kurama sweatdropped. "It's not that amazing. I thought that you'd have figured that out during all the times you've seen me in battle. I make them out of my energy. Besides," Kurama said holding up the roses, "my roses don't smell nearly this good."

"That's good. I just have to tell you something really important. I got a summoning message from Mukuro and I have to go and do an assignment for her. I'll be in Makai for a few days." Hiei said looking at the floor. Kurama slammed his hand down on the table the roses sat on. "When? How long exactly are you going to be gone?"

"I got the message yesterday, when you went out to do your errands. I'll be back in less than 3 days."

"Ok. Go. Just be back before the timelimit you've given me or it'll be a while before I'll be able to trust you again."

"I know. I don't have to go until tomorrow. Why don't we have some fun until then?" Hiei said wiggling his eyebrows.

"You need to keep that perverted mind of yours out of the gutter for more than 3 hours at a time, but I wouldn't mind having some fun. Who ever goes and gets the ice cream first gets to be on top. And no using any super human, sorry demon, speed."

"That's not fair. If I run like a regular human I wouldn't stand a chance." Hiei said pouting.

"That's the point." Kurama said dashing out of the room.

"You should come back here! I get to be on top this time! We made a deal with that!" Hiei said chasing after Kurama.

"No we didn't!" Kurama said after Hiei got into the kitchen.

" I love you fox. Only you forever."

"Me too Hiei. I love you and only you forever as well." Kurama said bringing Hiei into a mind-numbing kiss.

A/N: You guys are so lucky. I got reviews and this chapter is finally done. I'm glad that I didn't end the series like that. For once, I didn't leave it on an evil cliff hanger. This chapter made me so happy when I finally got the real good chapter done. After 4 drafts this got to be pretty good. It was unusual because I wrote this one out completely on paper and typed it up after that. I wasted around 13 pages of lined paper before I finally got myself to like this chapter. Thanks and please review like you always should.

Reviews:

shiorifoxiesmom: Thanks again for the review and sorry for the confusingness of it. Hope you liked this chapter as well.

BattosaiLover2004:I'm glad you thought it was cute and here's more for you.

Very bad evil kitten: Here's your update. Hope you liked this chapter as well.

UranusKnight: Thanks for the review and I hope that soon you'll be posting some stories for me to read. Hope you're happy that I updated.


	9. My life is in Chaos

A/N: Yeah! The chapters are finally going to get longer!hears cheers in the background Well, I just thought that I'd let you know that considering that I've decided how long it is really going to be. I have a lot to get through in just 3 more chapters after this one. So from here on out, the chapter will be getting longer. I'm cutting the limit of this fic to 12 chapters, and if I end it on a weird note or a bad place, I'll make a sequel series. Aren't you guys lucky? So I'm figuring that if I make each one around 5-11 pages, I'll get through everything that I want to. If not, then I'll have to make the sequel series start off kind of where I left stuff important to the story line out. I hope to see you for any future fics that I decide to write so please keep up with the stories and please read the author's notes. They can be extremely informational for my readers. I'm strange and hope you don't mind. So please don't kill me for forcing you to read chapter too terribly long, but I need to hopefully get this fic done before I collapse from exhaustion. For those of you who were wondering, the person who might or might not being raped is Kurama. In my head, it seemed like the only way to keep from hurting Hiei anymore than I already have. I figured that it was time for a little change of pace and making him suffer just a little because it seemed unfair to make hiei the one to go through all that pain all the time. I'm strange and want the characters to face around the same amount of sadness and grief as possible because I'm strange and want all of you to start wondering what is going through my head and I'm going to stop ranting now and let you read the fan fic before I go on and on for a whole page! I'll see you at the end for Reviews and **Important Information that may be useful for you!**

Disclaimer: Never for me, never for you. Only for the author.

Chapter 9: My life is in chaos

(Little A/N: This is mostly from Kurama's POV once again. Does anyone else know how hard it is to write from Hiei's perspective?)

I looked in the bed next to me. It was wrinkled, but there was no Hiei sleeping in it. I blinked the sleep out of my eyes and tried to remember. 'That's right,' I thought. 'Hiei left you for Makai yesterday. He'll probably be back tomorrow. It will be the 3rd day you know.' I sat up and wanted to find something to do considering it was a Sunday and Hiei wasn't there to cure me of my boredom. For some reason, the way that Hiei left made me think a lot more about us. How often would Mukuro be calling back Hiei to do errands for her? Would he get so wrapped up in his work that he forgot about me? Would he find another person to love besides me? If he really needed to leave and that he had an errand to do was just an excuse, he could have said so in the first place.

As Kurama walked down the street, he didn't notice the stealthily shielded Hiei following him. He was concealing his youki and hoped that Kurama wouldn't notice him for a while. 'He's walking down the street towards the park we told each other how we really felt was... Why in the world would he go there?'

I sat down on the bench and noticed something wrong with the place, like I'd been here before. Then I realized that this was where Hiei and I told each other how we really felt about each other. It's only been a couple of days and I already feel so lost without him by my side. I've come to depend on him so much... Tears start to well up in my eyes as I think that Hiei might never return. 'I've scared him off. What the hell is wrong with me?'

"Hiei, why aren't you here?" I whisper into the air. "Why aren't you here by my side like you should be? Why did you leave me?" I say still whispering. Then I feel him near me. And then I hear that wonderful voice of his, the one that can drive me wild.

"Who said that I wasn't here with you, or beside you like I am right now?" Hiei asked looking at me with concerned eyes.

" I thought you left me forever." I told him hugging him and putting my head in the crook of his neck and pulling him into an embrace.

"Why would I leave you forever?" He asked me with a serious tone. "I thought we went through this already. I love you and you forever. If I didn't why would I have even bothered coming back to see you?"

"I'm sorry," I sniffed and burrowed my head into his neck. " I don't know why I thought that, but I was thinking that if you left me, I'd have so much to lose that I might end up hurting myself in some way." I started crying again and was grateful that I had Hiei there to comfort me. Hiei embraced me and we started walking home together...

That's when I woke up. It had been such a wonderful dream too.

I looked at my bed to find it empty. It was similar to the dream. Only there was no wrinkles in the sheet. It was the 3rd day actually. I wandered around and hoped that Hiei was going to be back soon. There was something wrong. Hiei would have usually come to get me and tell me that it was alright that he'd been gone for only a few days, yet there's something that doesn't sit well with me. I'm sure that Hiei is in danger of something. I need to know for sure. It's time to go to Makai!

With Hiei and in his POV.

I sat down on a rock trying to regain my breath. I'd been running since morning from a couple of higher A-class demons that could easily win against me since I had had my guard down. It was getting harder and harder to keep out running them. Even with my speed, I can grow tired easily from too much excerise which I'm getting right now. I hope Kurama isn't worried about me and comes back to look for me... if he does, they'll kidnap him and possibly use him as a slave! There's no way that I would allow that to happen to my fox, so I have to get back to him as soon as possible!

With Kurama and his POV

I looked at the portal. 'Time to go and find my lover. I can't be happy or calm until I know he's safe.' I jumped through the portal and pulled out a rose in case I got into any real danger. The demons here might give me some trouble, but I can handle them if need be the case. I was trying to sense Hiei's youki when I sensed another strong aura coming towards me at full speed. It was someone that I knew, I just couldn't put my finger on it. Before I had the chance to find out who it was, my world went black and I fell into the oblivious darkness.

When I woke up, I realized that I was chained to a wall. My head hurt and I was still able to move around enough to feel the patch of dried blood on my scalp. Someone had hit me extremely hard with something and I wasn't exactly sure that I wanted to know who it was. There was something incredibly wrong with this picture. Where was I and why capture me of all... demons...

"So, you're finally awake are you?" a voice asked me in the darkness.

"Yes. Who are you and what do you want with me?" I asked scanning the area to see if I could see my attacker.

"Kurama, you make me feel so unloved by your tone and your expression." The voice said. "You should know me Kurama, after all, I was a previous lover for the infamous Youko. I am Karasu."

My eyes widened when I should have known it was him. It couldn't be possible! I killed him...!

"What's with the shocked look my dear Kurama? Aren't you happy to see me?" he asked with an excited look in his eyes.

"I killed you... I watched you die. You were dead after I used that plant... how?"

Karasu chuckled in amusement. "Yes Kurama you did kill me. I've come back to get revenge on you for that. You'll just have to be punished for it!" He yelled as he grabbed me around the throat. Suddenly, out of nowhere, he kissed me. I pulled my head away in disgust and anger. "Why did you bother to capture me? You have no use for me." I said with a menacing glare.

"Oh, but Kurama I do. You see, there's a little rumor going around that you and the Forbidden Child of the Ice People are, how should I put this, getting it on?"

"What's it to you?"

"Well, you see, my dearest Kurama, since I can see how much you love him, and how he crossed me so much, you'll just have to watch him die for your sake. With him out of the way, I can reclaim what was once mine." He looked at me with lustful eyes this time. "Do you know what that something is, Kurama?"

I whispered and realized that I wouldn't be getting out of here anytime soon. "Me."

He grabbed my head and kissed me hard on the mouth again. "That's right. You're mine. Now and forever more. Once again we'll be the famous pair of lovers in Makai. This will be fun." Karasu said against my neck. I couldn't help but moan under the pressure and the true statement that we'd once been lovers. Karasu had always been the one in control. The way he had me against the wall and ready to tackle him and be a lover to him once again only showed how much of a softie I had become in my time in Ningenkai. He was a god when he used his hands in such a way. I finally came to my senses that Hiei was nearby and I pushed Karasu away from me. I was panting and part of me wanted to have Karasu beneath me, just like in the old days. 'He can't have me now! I belong to Hiei, only him. No one else can have me as long as Hiei is alive! Please, Hiei! Help me!' I thought desperately. 'Please come and save me!'

Hiei's POV

Please, Hiei! Help me! Please come and save me!'

I heard Kurama's voice in my head. Where was he? What was he doing here in Makai? I had just arrived at the portal and realized that Kurama was calling out for me. 'Where are you?' I thought desperately waiting for an answer. No answer came. Then when it did, it was a mind-splitting scream that gave me one hell of a headache. "I'll find you soon, my fox. I'll find you soon..."

I ran to the tower where I heard cries of pain. Cries that were calling for me. Those calls were coming from Kurama. Who had him and what were they doing to him?" I ran up to the castle and when I got closer, I realized that Kurama was with... Karasu? How was he alive again? I looked through the dungeon window to see Karasu making love to my Kurama.

No, he wasn't making love, he was enforcing it. He was raping Kurama! I blasted through the window to save him. "Kurama!" I called. He looked up when I called him. The image of pain on his face turned to one of joy and happiness. "Hiei!" Then Karasu hit him on the head with a club.

I looked at him and saw Karasu standing over both of us with a look of satisfaction on his face. It was disgusting. He'd raped Kurama and might have killed him if I hadn't gotten here as soon as I had.

"Bastard," I said to him through gritted teeth.

"Now now, Hiei. You should know that it's not nice to call people names. Besides, you should know just how much fun Kurama and I had when we were making beautiful love just now. You shouldn't have interrupted us."

"If I hadn't, you'd probably have killed him."

"No Hiei. You're dead wrong. Don't you know that Youko and I used to be a match made in heaven? We were perfect for each other, when he suddenly got tired of me and left. We were famous in Makai and he left behind the fame to pursue more treasure. He valued gold over me. It made me angry so I got my revenge. When he killed me, it was another kind of leaving me. So when I found him wandering once again in his birth home, I took him in and made love to him. Unlike you, I know exactly what I wanted so I took it. In a way, it was the same with Youko. He took exactly what he wanted and he almost always got it. He wanted to use me and he succeeded with success. He made me feel hated and unwanted." He paused to look at me. "It's the same with you. You felt unloved and unwanted when you learned about your sister and how you'd never be able to tell her that her brother is a bastard child like you. You can't know real love because you're the Forbidden One. You might as well leave now to save yourself greif." Karasu grabbed me around the throat and pushed me up against the wall. "What I want now is to kill you. After I do that, Kurama will have no choice but to come to me for comfort."

"He'd never come to you." I said closing my eyes awaiting the death he was about to deliver.

"What do you mean?" he asked with sharp tone.

I opened my eyes. "You know that if you kill me, Kurama will find a way to kill himself to be with me don't you. I know him a bit better than you do, considering your death and all. He loves me a hell of a lot more than he ever would you, so he'd kill himself to be with me. Even death can't tear the bond we've created apart. I love him– " That's when my throat started getting crushed.

"He'll love me. You can't keep him away by dying. I'd be awake and by his side all the time, not like you who came back to do some thinking about what you should do about Kurama. You left him and he was saddened so much he came back here to find you." Karasu had turned very serious. He wasn't playing around with me anymore and he meant to kill me soon. It would take a lot of thinking and fast thinking to get out of this one.

Kurama's POV

I heard voices. Slowly my eyes started opening and I saw Hiei in Karasu's grasp. "You know that if you kill me, Kurama will find a way to kill himself to be with me don't you. I know him a bit better than you do, considering your death and all. He loves me a hell of a lot more than he ever would you, so he'd kill himself to be with me. Even death can't tear the bond we've created apart. I love him–" I heard him say to Karasu. Then I heard Karasu say to him, "He'll love me. You can't keep him away by dying. I'd be awake and by his side all the time, not like you who came back to do some thinking about what you should do about Kurama. You left him and he was saddened so much he came back here to find you."

"Karasu! Please just let Hiei go. I'll stay as long as you don't hurt him." My eyes started flooding with tears. "Please let him go..." I told him again tears running down my cheeks.

"Ha ha ha ha! Like I'm going to do that, Kurama. It seems that he wants you to live." He grasped hei's throat even harder. "Please Karasu! Let him go!" I called again. I blacked out again and hoped for the best and that when I opened my eyes next, that Hiei would still be alive.

A/N: I'm evil. I thought that since I haven't left you off on a cliff hanger for a while I'd do that this time around. I had Kurama get raped and Hiei might be dead when Kurama wakes up. Since I'm a sucker for types of endings, I might just have to make it so that Hiei dead. Now I'm messing with you and trying to make you angry for not telling you anything. This is going to be strange and confusing in the next chapter, and that's all that I can tell you. If you want to know slightly ahead of time, e-mail me and I'll give you a hint to who it is. I'm strange and when you put the subject for the email put something along the lines of: Hint for chapter 10.

It is better if I know what you're talking about ahead of time. Write me a message and hopefully I haven't lost any faithful readers by doing this to you all. I'm going to stop talking and let you review and ponder what the hell is going through my head. Read my profile to fill in a blank and possibly figure out that I'm not completely heartless. I hope to see you in the future and please continue reading this fic. Ja!


	10. You aren't near me now

A/N: There's something incredibly wrong with my brain. First I tell you that Kurama is going to be raped, and then I bring Karasu back to life. It's strange what's going on in my head. I'm crazier than I thought that I'd be when writing this fic. I'm hoping that you won't hold it against me when I tell you that I'm killing off a character. I'm joking by the way. I'd never kill off a character unless it was absolutely necessary. I hope that I'm going to finish this after the school year is over, in just a few weeks. It'll be great to be able to keep myself writing and keeping up with the other series. I'll probably be updating around once a week after this series is finished. With this chapter included, there's only 3 more chapters I hope that this is pretty good and that you like it. Reviews at end and a preview. Ja!

Disclaimer: I will never own the characters for as long as I live.

Chapter 10: You aren't near me now...

I woke up and found both Hiei and myself chained to a wall. Apparently Karasu didn't kill him, but decided to torture him instead. This is getting stranger than I thought that it would be. I hope that he will wake up soon. Why does Karasu want to torture me so? Does he know that Hiei is my weak spot? Does he know how much I am truly in love with him? I hope that if Karasu kills him, he'll get so sick of me sulking around, that he'll kill me as well. It's the best plan that I can think of at the moment. There is something wrong here. There's nothing really wrong with Hiei, like someone healed him. That's strange and all, but it's slightly normal for him. 'Hiei,' I thought looking at him longingly. 'I'm so sorry for all the trouble I caused. I never should have come looking for you, but when you were gone longer than I thought that you'd be, I came looking for you.' Tears once again welled up in my eyes. My eyes burned with the tears for how much I'd cried in the last few days. 'I never meant for you to suffer so much for a stupid fox like me. I'm so sorry Hiei. I wish that I could take it all back.' I let my eyes close as soon as the tears had decided to pour. I cried as silently as I could and since my head was turned away from me so I didn't notice Hiei waking from his slumber.

Hiei's POV

'I smell tears. Who's it coming from? I feel like I'm near you. Kurama, are you near me? I thought that I was dead, could you have died along with me?' I opened my eyes. I was greeted with darkness. 'I was wrong. You aren't near me now. Yet, who's tears am I smelling if I can't see who it is?' I felt my eyes with my hand. They were definitely opened. So why was I not able to see anything? Then it hit me. I'd gone blind. Hopefully the sight would return soon. There's just a little problem. I can't feel you near me now. You aren't here with me now.

Kurama's POV

I felt something wrong with the person next to me. Like they were trying to do something that they weren't able to. I looked over at Hiei and saw his eyes open. I was in shock mode. He was looking straight at me, yet he didn't even smile and say hello like I'd been waiting for him to do for so long.

"Hiei, are you alright?" I asked looking at him worriedly.

"Kurama, is that you?" He asked looking at me with even wider eyes than he had on his face right now.

"Yes silly. I'm so sorry I never meant for any of this to happen to you." I said pulling him into an embrace.

He hesitantly hugged me back. "You're not dead? I'm not dead?"

"No to both questions. Hiei, why didn't you say hello to me when I looked at you?"

"When did you look at me?" Hiei asked still looking at me in the strangest way.

"Just now, can you tell that I'm looking into your eyes right now?"

"No. All that I see is darkness. Kurama, I'm blind. I was afraid that you were gone and not any where near me. I smelled your tears and thought that it was you, but when I tried to look, I wasn't able to see you. I thought that I hadn't opened my eyes yet, but it seems that I can't see you at all." Hiei whimpered and looked pitiful. I hugged him tighter and then kissed him gently on the lips.

"You know that I'm here for you. I would never truly leave you. I want to be with you Hiei. You should know that by now." I told him more tears running down my face. 'How did you feel when you thought I left you?' I hugged him even tighter as I felt more and more tears running down my cheeks. Thank Inari that you hadn't died. I hate Karasu. That bastard is torturing us more and more. Why does he have to kill you? Is it to get revenge on me, the person who killed him before? I kept crying and holding Hiei in my arms and then heard the door open. "So I see. You must really love that forbidden child, Kurama. Don't you know that since you now let me know your true feelings for something that you truly love, that I'll just kill it?" Karasu asked me grinning.

"Bastard, you aren't going to kill him so easily. You know that don't– " Karasu cut me off by putting his lips on top of mine. "Kurama, Kurama. You should know by now that if you make me angry that I'll just make you pay with something else." He started kissing my neck again. "Do you know what that something is Kurama?" I shuddered underneath his touch. "That's what I don't want to know," I replied looking at him with glaring evil eyes. Karasu laughed. "I want your body. I want you to hold your head back again for me to hear the moans of pleasure as you experienced yesterday. You know how much that would please me." He whispered into my ear, breath sitting on the earlobe even after he left it. "Now Kurama, you know how well Hiei listens? He's even better at following instructions than you are. Sweet Kurama, you aren't the only person I slept with yesterday." My eyes took a quick sideways glance at Hiei. Of course Karasu noticed. Seemed today that Karasu really had a cruel sense of humor compared to other days. Why did he need Hiei of all people. Hiei didn't kill him, I did. So why use Hiei? It hit me then. If he didn't use Hiei, it really wouldn't have a point to torute me. I see it now. I don't know how I could have been so blind to the topic. I was such and idiot for not seeing this before. "Kurama, what are you thinking about?" Karasu asked stroking my hand. I held Hiei closer to myself. 'Hiei, can you hear me?' I thought knowing that Karasu didn't have telepathy. 'What Kurama? And yes I can hear you.' He replied with his eyes closed. 'I know this is a lot to ask, but will you please not leave me for this?'

'What are you going to do kurama?' he asked with a worried tone in his voice. 'I'm going to try and convince him that I love him. Maybe if I do, then he won't kill you.'

'Wouldn't he ask your permission to kill me or ask you to do it?' He asked still worried.

'Most likely. I'll tell him that I need to kill you while I'm alone and I'd be able to feel his presence whether or not he was masking his energy. I'll pretend to kill you, so go back home ok? My mom will take care of you for a while. Tell her that I'm on a trip and I'll be back as soon as I can.'

'Ok. How will I be able to get to the portal?'

'you'll be able to feel your way there. Hiei,' I thought breaking off slightly since Karasu was giving me an interested look

'yeah? What Kurama? Don't worry so much.' He said trying to calm me down.

'Just promise me you'll be careful.'

'I will. Don't worry so much my silly fox. You know I love you. Be grateful that I'm going along with this crazy plan of yours.'

'I am. Thanks for everything. I just wish that I was able to help more than I am.'

Hiei mentally smiled at me. 'This is more than enough thanks. I love you.'

'I love you too.' I looked up at Karasu and kissed him on the lips. I felt his eyes widen in surprise and hands then take me further into his arms to deepen the kiss. Karasu was the one who broke it off. 'What a stupid idea I had,' I thought looking at Karasu. 'He'll probably just kill me anyway just for the hell of it and for fun.' "Kurama, why'd you do that? I thought that you hated me." Karasu asked looking longingly into my eyes that I noticed were filling with lust. "I can't hate you. You should know by now that I never stopped loving you. I just didn't want to wear down the reputation I had put up for myself as a player. Do you understand?"

'Hiei, these words next might hurt you but please know that they aren't true. I still love you and only you my love.' I told him telepathically.

'Kurama I understand. Thanks for letting me know ahead of time. But they might still sting. At least I know that they'll never be true. I love you my fox.'

"Karasu," I whispered into his ear, blowing hot air into it. "I wanted you to know that I love you still, as I did before. You should know that." Karasu shifted under my weight and I knew that he wanted to sleep with me again. Only this time he knew it wouldn't be rape, it would be me willing to do it with him. "Kurama, are you sure you don't mind me killing Hiei, whom you seemed to love so very much?" Karasu asked glancing at Hiei ever so slightly. "It was an act." That's when the pain hit Hiei's heart. This was the hard part and words that Kurama had been talking about earlier. "I never loved him. It was only an act to make him weak so that I could use him and discard him like so may of the others that I used back in my day." It kept hurting even after Kurama had stopped talking. _It was all an act, all an act._ This is what was rolling through my head. Never had Kurama said anything about being mates for life, so why am I starting to think that Kurama is really telling the truth? He wouldn't lie about loving me. No way in any of the worlds would he lie about loving me. "Karasu, will you please let me do the honor of killing him instead of you? Torture him like you did me?" Kurama asked. I sensed Karasu smirk. "Sure. You do that. To let you know, I have to go out for a while and I expect no Hiei here in my room understood? I'll be back in 5 hours." I felt Kurama's hand tighten on my arm and I winced in pain just slightly. "I understand. I expect you to be back to let me have some fun in 5 hours time." Kurama said seductively. "Would you prefer I stay?"

"No. I want to have Hiei all to myself for the time that you are gone. Please make me feel better about it when you get back." Kurama asked looking pleadingly at Karasu.

"Of course Kurama. I'll be sure to make you moan beautifully like I used to do in the old days."

"Can't wait for that." Kurama said.

At the portal Kurama hugged me and told me goodbye. My eyesight had come back so I would be able to make it back to Kurama's house while Kurama was trying to escape. "Hiei, I love you. Please don't find someone else while I'm away. I wouldn't be able to live with that if you left. Promise me you won't leave." Kurama asked pulling me into an even tighter embrace.

"Silly fox. Of course I promise." I pulled away and waved good-bye as I walked through the portal. I was hoping that Kurama would be returning soon.

A/N: Ok. This is actually a good place to stop for right now. I was hoping to make this longer, but after a few drafts it turned out like this. Only 2 more chapters after this. Hope you're ok with me ending the series in such a good way. Just so that people know, the next chapter won't be posted until after the 14th of June because I'm going to be gone on vacation with the family until the 13th. Then I'm at training for Cross-country Running. Hope I'm going to give a preview for the next chapter because I'm such a nice person. Only the preview isn't the prettiest thing that you've ever seen. Ja for now!

Preview: "Kurama! You defied me! You didn't kill Hiei but let him walk free! Now you have to be punished again!" Karasu yelled as he held me down on the bed with one hand the other reaching down to start the torture again. It had been the same for the last few days. 'Hiei, I hope I'll see you soon.'

Reviews:

**Hiei's Gothic Angel:** Thanks for the review. It is the little something that I've read multiple times just to make me laugh... Thanks again and so you know Hiei gets away duh you read the fic, sorry. Hopefully anyway. And to let you know, I'm not going to kill anyone off, because I'm a sucker for a happy ending. Are you sad that this story only has 2 more chapters? Once again thanks and hope that You'll update Suicidal Thoughts soon!

**Very bad evil kitten:** Thanks for the review and hope that this was resolved in some ways. The preview is to make it more of a cliffhanger than the actual chapter was.. Any way again thanks and sorry that I don't write as much as I should. If I had gone past this point, there would have been chaos and you'd have been terribly angry... thanks and hope this chapter was something that you liked in some ways!

**BattosaiLover2004:** Thanks for the review and soon I'll have the next chapter up. Hope that you like them long. It'll be done soon, but can't be posted until I get back. You'll just have to read my other works in the meantime...

**UranusKnight:** I'm glad that you like the last chapter and hope that you liked this one too. Thanks for the review and sorry that it took so long to get this chapter up.

**shiorifoxiesmom: **Thanks for the review and acknowledging that I am evil. Hope this chapter cleared up a few things about the fic. Thanks again for the review and the cliffhanger isn't nearly as bad.

Yeah! 5 reviews! That's so much more than I ask for per chapter. I guess it wasn't impressive as the 11 per chapter... I liked that. It made me feel so loved! I gotta go so that I can get more done on the 11th chapter! I'll see you all for that chapter and once again please review and have a nice day. I'll see you soon I hope! Jane!


	11. Time to return

A/N: Yeah! I'm back again! It's time for chapter 11! I'm sure that with the last preview you're wondering what I'm going with in the fic. Just to let you know, I really shortened the fic itself quite a bit and finally managed to get more covered in the last chapter than I thought that I would. . . I just want to you to know about the preview is that no matter how bad it may seem, no matter how depressing it may become, the fics that I write will always have a happy ending. To let all of you know, there is going to be a surprise ending. The ending is going to be a good way to end it and force me to do a sequel series. I'm sure that you'll love it. There is something that will happen to Kurama. The question is one my brother and I were talking about a few days ago when we were playing video games. I want to let all of you know that even if this is the 2nd to last chapter, it won't be so depressing as the last chapter. Not so much in anyway really. Let me stop ranting and let ya'll know that I don't own the characters or the series. See you at the end for reviews and a tiny, tiny, preview. Ja for now!

Disclaimer: Never. Don't try and say that I do, because I don't.

Chapter 11: Time to return.

I paced Kurama's room and hoped that he would be back soon. He'd been gone for a few days and Shiori had told me to just make myself comfortable until he got back, but he got me out a few days ago. 'Please Kurama. Please come back soon.' I thought tears welling up inside my eyes again. It had been the 3 time that week. 'I need you fox. Don't let him have you. Escape and come back to me. Fox,' I thought tears pouring down my cheeks. 'I need you. I love you more than I ever thought that I would. When I told you before, part of me was still lying to you. I wasn't ready to give up everything meaning: my heart, my soul, and my body for you. Now that I know how much you really mean to me, I would give up everything to see you smile at me again. God how I need you Kurama.' Tears continued to flow as I sat on his bed, and stared out the window that I used to just come into. There must have been something wrong for you to have not come back soon.

Kurama's POV

I wailed in pain as Karasu beat me again. Then he repeated what he had been saying for the last 6 days in this time zone."Kurama! You defied me! You didn't kill Hiei but let him walk free! Now you have to be punished again!" Karasu yelled as he held me down on the bed with one hand the other reaching down to start the torture again. It had been the same for the last few days. 'Hiei, I hope I'll see you soon.'

Days seemed to go by slower and slower as Karasu pushed against my butt in an attempt to make me moan again. There was no pleasure in what he was doing. I knew that I needed to return to you soon, Hiei. I just didn't know when I'd get another chance to kill him to get back. Hiei, I'm all too sure that It won't be soon. Karasu continues to push against me, and I scream in pain. I hope that you don't feel my pain Hiei, because it is hard to bear as it is. If you feel it too, it just makes it that much worse. I can feel your worry and anticipation of when I get back home, but Hiei, I'm not sure how much longer it will be before I'll see you again. Do you remember the time that you held me in your arms and didn't want to let me go. It was something that I had to do, in order to keep on seeing you. Do you remember?

_Flashback_

"_Kurama, do you have to leave? I thought that today was a day off for you. . ." Hiei trailed off, knowing full well that I had school today until noon, but didn't want me to leave. Knowing what he was thinking, since my mom was out of town, I started laughing. We hadn't slept together since that first time. "Hiei, I know what you're thinking." I said in a singsong voice trying to snare him up into a conversation. _

_Hiei slumped down on the couch and scoffed. "Yeah, I'm so sure of that." I gently pulled you into my lap as you tried to escape. You yelped slightly as my had made it's way down your stomach and hard abs to your crotch area. "You want this don't you Hiei?" I said seductively, stroking your hardening manness under the fabric. "You want to feel me inside you again, don't you Hiei? You want to feel the push and pull as I leave you ass. . . Hiei, since my mother is out of town, we can do it when I get back. I'll only be gone for 3 and a half hours anyway. So no need to worry about things like this until I get back. That ok with you?" I felt the hardness pushing against my hand wanting a release. Hiei's breathing changed as I pulled my had away from the gentle stroking and knowing that he wanted more. "Kurama, you'd better make it up to me for torturing me so with that." Hiei called as I walked out the door. I turned back and winked. "You know that I will."_

_End of Flashback. _

I smiled at the flashback and knew that since Karasu would be dragging me back up to his room, with the toys, I'd have another chance to kill him. When we got there, both still naked, he threw me onto the feather-light bed and started to root through his toy box. I pulled the rose out of my hair and before he knew what was happening, Karasu was sliced to pieces. I ran down and pulled on my clothes. That's when I gathered myself and was ready to leave to see you again.

Hiei's POV

I knew that you were doing better in some ways and worse in some. I could feel you inside me and for a couple of hours, the only thing that I wanted to do was scream. You and I are connected and it hurts. I feel your emotions and physical pain. Do you feel mine too? I hope that you know the longing that I feel and that you want to come home as badly as I want you to. Kurama, please come home soon and let me hold you in my arms and let me tell you how much I love you. God how I've come to love you kitsune. I never thought that I would hurt this much form lack of affection. Please, Kurama, fox, Youko. All of you come back to me and hold me in your arms. I need to feel you again.

Kurama's POV

I walked out of the castle. Finally I got sick of Karasu hurting me so I killed him again. If he comes back again, the first time I see him, I'm going to kill him. He'd done so much to me in the last week. Not here, back in Ningenkai. Hiei, it's time for me to return. Are you going to welcome me back with open arms? I hope so, because as soon as I get back, I'll need to feel the actual loving arms of someone other than my mother. It can _only _be you. God how I long to see you again. Hiei, come and see me and get me home. The only place I call home.

Hiei's POV

You are getting closer to your home Kurama! I'll come and get you as soon as you are out of the portal. The people or demons who love you are coming to see you. Kurama, as soon as I see you, I'm pulling you into my lips for the sweetest kiss that I've longed for. It's been longer for you. I can't help but want to have you again. It's going to be grand to see you again my loveable fox.

Kurama's POV

I walked through the portal and looked at how much that Ningenkai hadn't changed since I'd last seen it. In this time zone, it's been only 2 and a half weeks since I've been here. That's a five week period with Karasu. That's just too much even for one person. I saw you running at your abnormal speed through the trees and you looked up at me with the most loving eyes I've ever seen from you. I've missed having you in an embrace and things that are harder to say don't need words, but actions. I kissed you with a certain passion that spoke something along the lines of 'take me now, no matter how much I'm injured. Just make love to me so I can forget the pain.' I knew that even you of all the demons in Makai wouldn't do that even if I begged you too. Hiei, when I finally got to hold you in my arms again, I stood my ground and then I saw your eyes widen as I blacked out.

Hiei's POV

I ran through the trees toward you and knew exactly where you were because of your energy. Have you killed Karasu yet? Is he dead and we don't have to worry about it anymore? I hope so. That way he won't come after us anymore. I pulled you into me in a hungry kiss. You kissed be back, knowing full well that you wanted me to make love with you. I knew that wouldn't happen because of how much pain you had endured. I wouldn't do that until I was completely sure that you had basically no pain left in you because of Karasu. Then when you pulled away and just hugged me, it felt like heaven, like I belonged here. Then when you fainted and I caught you, I was worried that you'd spent too much of your energy getting back here. I can't blame you. Who would want to stay there?

I put you on the bed and listened to your heartbeat and measured your energy levels. You had a steady beat to your human heart, and the levels were dangerously low. Not to mention that you had more cuts and bruises than I was able to count. I managed to get my sister, Yukina over to your house to heal you. With the cuts healed, all that we had to do was wait for the emotional pain to subside and you'd be good as new when your energy levels came back up. I sat by your bed for days on end, waiting for you to wake back up. I swore to myself that I wouldn't cry when you finally came around, but I wasn't able to help it. When your eyes finally opened, the tears came without warning and rolling down my face. I knew that it didn't really matter, but I just wanted you to know that no matter what, I was here for you. 'Kurama, finally I know that you're alright again. Please don't scare me anymore. Don't worry me anymore. I just need to know that you still love me.'

"Kurama? Are you alright?" I was barely able to ask because of all the tears rolling down my cheeks. The tears stopped flowing and I knew that you hadn't answered yet. "Kurama, are you ok?" I asked again, only with not me being relieved, but me being worried. I looked over to him and noticed that his eyes were opened, and that he was breathing. So why wasn't he answering me. I slowly peered over at his face so that I could have a good look into his eyes. I pulled on your hair and noticed how limp it seemed. 'That's strange... why isn't it like it usually is with the fluffiness and all?' I pulled you into my lap. Finally I got a reaction. I noticed that your hair had gotten more body and seemed stronger to it. I smiled softly noticing full body to it. As long as you are kind of conscious the hair has body to it. I suppose that it reflects your personality quite well Kurama.

I looked down at you and noticed tears welling up in your eyes, like I'd done, only these were tears of pain, not happiness. "Kurama, are you alright?" I asked for the 3rd time that day. Kurama nodded and I gently lifted his lips to mine in a chastise kiss. You moved you mouth against mine and all I wanted was to hold you in my arms forever. And to let all of you know, forever is a long time, even for a demon. You pushed against me and I knew that you wanted to speak. When I finally opened my eyes, I noticed that the tears that had been welling up had been pouring down your face. I liked away the tears and pulled you into another embrace. I was careful not to hurt your injured arms or legs in the process. "Kurama, what's wrong? I asked you before, but you didn't answer me. Why not?" Tears were welling up again.

"You were inside me Hiei, I could feel your happiness so intense. ... I didn't have the strength to answer you and let you know that my physical pain hurt more than ever. I could feel is slightly in my sleep, but as I started to wake up, the pain got more and more intense. I sensed that Yukina was here, and healed me for the most part, but only did what she was able. You need to tell her that you're her big brother. Hiei, you'll never know how hard it was for me not to be able to see you everyday." You stopped talking and kissed me again. "I never doubted for a minute that you'd come and see me to bring me home. I knew from your emotions, that you'd finally accepted me as your partner to love and ready to give up everything for me. I never stopped loving you for one second. I can never apologize for how much grief I've caused you, and I'm not going to let anyone come between us anymore. Hiei, if I'm willing, and you are willing, will you let me mark you and you mark me, to be bound my a bond even stronger than love?" You asked offering me your neck and shoulder. My eyes widened. "Kurama, I– you really want to carry the mark of the Forbidden Child and the one who has always been discarded?" When you nodded I bend down to your neck and marked you as mine. I bit into the flesh, and liked the blood clean. You were bound to me. Now for me to be bound to you, my lover, my love and now, my life partner and my mate. You sucked on my neck and liked the blood away when you bit the flesh to make it bleed. We were joined by an even stronger force.

Kurama's POV

I finally knew how it was to be bound to someone. Only when they share such a strong connection to one another that the feel each other's intense emotions and pain, only can they make good mates for one another. We share that bond, and only with that bond are we able to call each other the one who owns us. No one else can claim either of us and that's all I ever wanted. To have Karasu call me 'his fox, his Kurama' it made me feel like a slug, like something dirty. Later that night, when I held you in my arms for what was like, the first time in weeks, and in Makai it was, I knew that this is where I belonged. I belonged in this bed with you beside me. I don't want to have anyone else beside me now. No one could take your place. I never want to let you go again. Hiei, do you want to know something? I never thought that loving someone who started out as cold and harsh as you, could feel like it was all I needed to complete my life.

A/N: Are you people happier? I finally finished this chapter. The next chapter is kind of just wrapping up some of the smaller details and the introduction into the next series. This chapter made me happy. This only took 2 drafts to make me happy with it and I was crying as I was writing it. It made me so happy that I was able to do something like this and make it seem sweet without being cheesy. Like I said before, a new surprise ending on the way. Seems like a good way to end of the series right? With Kurama, telling all of us that all he needed to complete his life was Hiei. Sorry, can't work quite like that when I'm writing a series. I gotta go and finish the next chapter, and to let all my faithful readers know, this won't be the end, and the sequel isn't going to be as sad, but hopefully, there will be some humor involved in the story itself. Ja and review please!

Preview:

"Hiei! You need to come here!" Kurama yelled from the top of the stairs. Hiei ran up and went into Kurama's room. "What's wrong?" Hiei asked looking around for him. Hiei ran into Kurama's bathroom and saw him holding a box of something called... tests. What are they? Why does Kurama look so pale and ready to hurl. It's only 10 in the morning and Kurama is hurling? Wait! Does this mean that Kurama is..."

Hehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe. Ok enough laughing. That's the most evil preview, ne? Gotta let ya ponder over it and be happy if you figure it out. Don't ask what is going on in the preview because I don't want anyone giving it away. Ja and see you for the final installment of this series!


	12. I wish I could, but never

A/N: Yeah! It's the last chapter. sniff and cries out! I don't want to end it so soon, but can't change my mind now, for the fact that for the last few chapters I've been telling you all that it's only going to be a 12 chapter series. This is it. I hope that all of you like it and will be reading the sequel series to this. No telling the title until the end. Considering the story I have in mind, it would give away the ending. I love all my readers and I hope that forever more, you'll be hoping to read my further works. People who write their own fanfics, I'll try and get around to reading yours, as soon as I get this chapter posted and maybe another oneshot. I'm going to be gone, so I'm trying and get done as much of this as possible. The sad stuff is finally over and everyone should be happy about that. cheers come from the faithful readers as everyone knows that this is going to be the happy ending. So, here it is, and hopefully you aren't going to kill me for the ending and waiting on me for the sequel series to come out. I'll be working on it during vacation and I want you to know that with my luck, I'll have around 4 chapters done by the time I get back. The last chapter is finally here and I can't help but get teary eyed when I finally finish a series. The series carries my emotions and finishing a series makes me feel so good. Well, I'll let you read the last installment now and reviews are at the bottom like always. Ja

Disclaimer: Never. I wish I could, but never.

Warning: Some lime in here, not much around 2 paragraphs. Then I go to the next morning.

Chapter 12: Hate me never, love me forever

Kurama and Hiei walked through the park, looking for Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Botan. They were supposed to meet them in the special park to get another assignment from Botan. When they arrived, Yukina, and Genkai were there as well. "Oh! Kurama-san, Hiei-san! Keiko and Shizuru will be arriving soon." Yukina said, hugging both her brother, who blushed deeply by being hugged by his sister, and Kurama. "Yukina," Kurama said taking Yukina into an embrace, getting a very jealous Hiei glaring at him, "thanks for healing me when Hiei brought me back to my house after me getting abused by Karasu."

Yukina nodded and pulled from Kurama and smiled. "It was no trouble. Hiei explained to me what went on there, even though I didn't really want to know, and I was more than happy to help. I'm so happy that you and Hiei are together as a couple, Kurama-san. I give my congratulations to you both." Yukina smiled and then looked ever so confused as Botan, Kuwabara, Keiko, and Shizuru, (both of who were just arriving) when they looked extremely confused. Yusuke just stood there and grinned at the two of them. Hiei was in shock mode, and Kurama was blushing heavily. Genkai started to laugh, and was soon joined by the others. "We're here actually celebrating the two of you getting together. We've been expecting it for a while." Genkai stated and gestured to the multiple picnic baskets placed on the table behind her with 4 blankets beneath them. Kurama and Hiei just stood there in shook mode as people started to take the blankets and set them out on the grass.

Kurama's POV

I was stunned. How did all of them know that Hiei and I were together anyway? Then I shot a glance sideways at Yusuke. You dog. You told genkai and Yukina didn't you. It doesn't really matter anyway. At least everyone is happy for us. Then I felt a tap on my shoulder. There stood Yusuke with a bouquet of roses. "Thanks for everything Kurama. These are from Keiko and me." He smiled at me and laughed as I stood there and smiled at him. "Thanks. I don't mean to be a burden on anyone. Thanks again for taking care of me." I called over to Keiko, "Thanks for the roses. I know that you spent money on them and Yusuke stole them to say that they were from both of you." I grinned and looked at Yusuke's fearful face. It said something along the lines of: 'how did you know?' because just then, Keiko came over and punched Yusuke in the face and started yelling at him. That just happened to be the time that I chose to crack up. I started laughing and I looked over at Hiei. He was in a heated conversation with Yukina. 'Took you long enough,' I said to him mentally. 'Shut up.' came the reply. 'It just seemed to be the best time to tell her, that's all.' I started laughing again. Just then I heard a squeal and say Yukina pounce on top of Hiei to give him a hug. "You're my long lost brother Hiei! I'm so happy that I finally found you." I continued to watch the others talk and I walked over to the lake to gaze out onto the sparkling water. I didn't even notice Hiei approaching me with a bowl of chocolate ice cream. "Here, have some sweet snow." Hiei said kissing me gently before continuing to eat his ice cream. I watched him softly and knew that he would eat mine if I didn't. I handed it to him. "Not hungry?" He asked me looking confused. Normally I would have hugged the ice cream to me, and try to prevent Hiei from eating it. "I'm fine. I want to have energy, for certain 'activities' when we get home." I told him wiggling my eyebrows.

Hiei's POV

I pulled Kurama into the room and closed the door. 'Thank god that Shiori isn't going to be back for another 4 days.' I thought knowing that if Kurama chose to, he could read my mind. We were mates after all. I struggled with pulling off Kurama's shirt, the buttons were giving me too much trouble. "Can I just rip this off?" I asked tugging on the shirt. "Yeah, there are too many buttons on the stupid thing anyway." Kurama replied tugging off my cloak and started working on my belts. I ripped the shirt off and threw it across the room. We weren't going to need that anymore anyway. Kurama's silk pants only had a string attached to them and I started working on those to keep from jumping on him and trying to make love to him with lack of skin. Only skin will satisfy me now. We continued and Kurama and I fought for dominance for the top. I compromised and let him stay on top, and waited patiently for him to continue. I felt his breath on the tip of my hardness and he brought me to my climax by only sucking on the hardness that lays beneath the belt line.

The next morning.

Kurama and I lay content in the bed that we shared and knew that this was the only life that either of us wanted with the other. "I should probably go and shower." I told him, gesturing to the bathroom. Then Kurama looked at me seductively and smiled. "Want to have some company?"

It was only going to get better as life went on. I was walking through the house one Monday morning and I heard huffing in the bathroom and I knew that something was wrong with Kurama.

Why is throwing up in the morning now as we were just beginning to be a happier couple. There hadn't been any big trouble for the last few days. Peace was nice to have every once in a while. I just knew that with Kurama acting like this, there was something wrong and it couldn't possibly be the way that it was supposed to be.

A few days later, or more correctly, a week since the park, Kurama stared getting moody and was only able to stand certain foods and smells. What in the world was going on. You'd never believe how dense I was until then.

This went on for a few more days. Then suddenly I heard, "Hiei! You need to come here!" Kurama yelled from the top of the stairs. Hiei ran up and went into Kurama's room. "What's wrong?" Hiei asked looking around for him. Hiei ran into Kurama's bathroom and saw him holding a box of something called pregnancy tests. What are they? Why does Kurama look so pale and ready to hurl. It's only 10 in the morning and Kurama is hurling? Wait! Does this mean that Kurama is pregnant. "Hiei, it hurts and I know there's gotta be something wrong with me. I can't be pregnant! I'm a male!" There was something seriously wrong with this situation. Why was Kurama pregnant of all things that he could be? What were we going to do now? I know that we'll be able to deal with it, and whatever happens from now on, we'll handle all this together.

"Kurama, I know this may seem wrong, but we'll both make great parents for our child." I squeezed your hand and kissed you gently on the lips. "We'll be going through this together so I don't think that it will matter whether or not we need to worry about the baby. If needed, we can get an abortion to keep it from living in a world of pain, but since it's a demon child, ours no less, I don't believe that we'll have to worry about anything." I held you in my arms and felt your lips touch mine and want to keep you safe. Then you smiled at me and held my hand over your stomach. I could feel the life growing there, and in just a few months time, the child would be born. 5 months is the limit for any child, no matter what kind of demon you are. In that short amount of time, we'll be 2 of the luckiest men in the world.

Hiei, I long to be near you. There's so much that I want to know

I know that in so many ways that you love me

I know that you long to be near me.

I thought that you wanted to stay away at first,

and now I know that you can't help but love me.

I finally love you more than ever.

Holding you in my arms shows me how much you care.

You don't push me away.

I am happier than I have felt for such a long time.

I want you near me all the time, and

I know so much more about you than I used to .

Hiei, I never thought that I'd really fall for you,

and I wanted to push you away as soon as you fell for me.

Part of me wasn't able to for the fact that I didn't want to hurt you.

I love you so much more than this life.

Yet, I can't pull away from this place I call home.

Do you count me as your home, Hiei?

Do you feel that the place that I live in now, isn't a home,

but a haven for the lovers such as us.

We are supposed to be the unmarkable,

yet we've marked each other

and all of the things that we love are with each other.

I love you and there is so much that I want to know about you.

I never want you to hate me, I want to love you always

I want you to never hate me,

and I really want to have you to love forever.

Hiei, can you let me do so?

I hope so, because I'm not going to be going anywhere.

Kurama, there was always something wrong with me in so many ways.

I wanted to use you then push you away.

I never really thought I'd be falling in love with you so much that I'd do this much for you.

Kurama, I realized something over the last events and everything that we had to do to get here.

Kurama, I never meant to get you so hurt.

I never meant for all this to happen and I never meant for you to fall in love with me.

Can I tell you something though?

I'm really glad that all of this went down the way that it did.

I finally know that we can't be separated and we can finally be together in more ways than one.

I want you to know something else about me.

My feelings haven't changed since that day.

Since the first time you held me in your arms,

there was a part of me that would never be able to feel complete,

that part needed you to hold me and let me know exactly what you think.

Kurama, there is so much that I still long to know about you.

I want to know why you choose me of all people, I want to know everything that I can.

I want to hold you near me forever and never let me go.

Kurama, there's so much that I love about you and So

so much that I long to learn.

Did you ever want to know about me in such a way?

For now, there's all I need to know about you.

Kurama, I know that you love me, and I know exactly what you want me to do.

I never want to be separated from you for a minute.

Kurama, I know that you love me, no matter where I come from.

I finally realized my love for you, in so many more ways than one.

I wanted you to hate me for now, but that was then.

Then, I wanted you to love me later, but now,

Kurama, I want you to have me never

and love me, and myself only, forever.

FIN

Afterward

I was so happy when I finished this series. I know that the whole thing with Hiei talking in the stuff above in so cheesy, but I couldn't help but make it so extremely happy in the end. They aren't worried about the child yet, because it has yet to have to face the world. It'll be good when the child is born, because both of them know that it is the right thing. I was ready to cry when I wrote the last words of the fic and I know that no matter what, the two of them will be happier together as a couple, then apart from each other. I don't want to have you hurt and I hope that you know that no matter what, any comments that you give me are appreciated and with the ending I gave, I know that people will be angry with me, and there will be people hoping that all goes well and that they'll have the child. The series itself was inspired my the muses that I have, and one of them is Youko Kurama. He did quite a lot of the more depressing scenes for me, then I added my personal touch to them. One of my other muses, Lauren didn't think it a good idea for me to even write this fic in the first place, knowing that I'd be making people wonder what I was going to do next. It's just a habit for me. I love the fact that people reviewed my fan fic and I love the fact that each chapter has gotten at least 2 reviews. I never thought that any of my fanfics would be quite this popular and I'm so happy that people liked the chapters. The series is so good in my perspective and I know that I'm going to be doing more and more fanfics. This inspires me to continue on the novel I'm writing and that I'll be doing so many things with my life. I dream of being a chef, but maybe being an author would be better suited for me don't ya think? Well, this is kind of a rant that I'm putting here in the last chapter to let you all know some things about me. I hope that you liked the series and that you want me to continue writing and let you read more of my fanfics. I have a whole page on what's going to happen in the next series and it will take probably 3 chapters before anyone else knows that Kurama has gotten pregnant. The series is kind of eventful in itself don't you think. Even if the chapters are the shortness that they are, they cover a lot more than you would think. I love the fact that you are keeping up and the people who have reviewed every chapter or almost every chapter get all kinds of hugs and tears form me. I'm crying again. I am so happy with the fic itself and these two made it. I send hugs to them and I want so many things for you both, Hiei, Kurama. I hope that you can forgive me for putting you two through so much pain, but at least I got you near where you needed to be didn't I? I'm crazy and I have to say goodbye for now and I know that you readers are probably ready to kill me for ranting for so long and that you want me to get on with the sequel right? I'll be doing that and I hope to see you all for the next series and hope that no matter what, I have people who want me to continue writing. I need you all to keep up please and let me know what you want me to put in the next series. I accept ideas and criticism. I love all of you and I need to know that you love me too. I'm going to sign off for now, and let me know what you think.

A/N: So did you cry? I told you that I was going to give you a surprise ending! I hope that you are anticipating the arrival of the next series. The name of the series is going to be called:

**My child, how do you think you came to be? **I am going to stop everything now and let you do the final reviews for the chapter. I love all the people who read the story and the people who review even more. I never thought I'd say this, but if you decide not to review this chapter, I'd be ready to cry. I love the series and I'm hoping for at least 4 reviews for the final installment and to know that people like the series. I say Ja for now and I'll hope to see you all for the next series. For now, Ali-chan bids you farewell and waves goodbye to all those who know that I love them, I dedicate this entire series to the person that I love most in the world. Sorry for my readers, but the person who I love, I don't think that its any of you. It's someone important in my life, and he is able to give me the strength to live life to the fullest and know there's always another way to do something. I love him and all of you! Ali-chan leaves you with a giant platefull of cookies and multiple gallons of milk in the fridge. JA!


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